


Gemini

by aqxas (orphan_account)



Category: Youtube (RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Flower Shop, Alternate Universe - Photographer, Darkiplier Mark Fischbach, Gen, Multi, Multiple Personalities, POV First Person, Supernatural Elements, slight tythan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-27
Updated: 2017-07-11
Packaged: 2018-10-11 15:43:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 36,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10468452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/aqxas
Summary: I first saw him in only a glimpse.(He could give him anything.)





	1. Daffodil

     I first saw him in only a glimpse. A black jacket, a mess of dark hair, weaving through the crowd with ease. We made eye contact briefly, and his stare was so intense, yet so fleeting, and I could still feel him looking at me after he had disappeared behind a wave of people. 

     The only reason I was even here was because my friends had dragged me along. I’m not really one for populated places, let alone night clubs, but my friend had begged and pleaded with me to come with him, telling me that it would be “just us dudes” and we might even “pick up some chicks”, even though he knew I wasn’t even remotely interested. When I looked at all the people around me, dancing and gyrating and sitting martinis, it only hurt me more to glance in a mirror on the wall and just see a tired loser of a boy holding a club soda. All the pretty people, partying away drunkenly and letting their worries wash away to the beat, and there I was, standing in the corner, pondering ways to discreetly escape. If my friends caught me, I could always play sick. 

     Just as I was about to make my move to leave, I saw that particular man. Although he could be described as just your average party-goer, there was something about him that seemed off. Maybe it was the way he walked, the way he stared me down so heavily, or the way he simply vanished like a ghost. Something was drawing me to him like a moth to a flame, like he was silently daring me to follow him, consequences be damned. My heart began to beat faster, from fear of the unknown and the thought that anything could happen if I decided to obey my impulses. Those impulses, however, were incredibly mixed and confusing - a part of me wanted to sprint after this mystery man, this shadow that was slipping from my grasp the longer I waited, but another part of me told me to run as fast as I could. There was danger there, but along with the danger was that poisonous intrigue. 

     While my thoughts were swimming through my head in an internal battle of logic, I saw him again. There he was, all the way across the room, leaning against the exit door with his hands in his pockets and those deep, dark eyes staring at me once more. The lights of the club were flashing slowly across his figure, bathing him in red light, blue light, green light, no light, a sight so hypnotizing. 

     I swallowed. He was taunting me. As I set my half-empty glass down on a nearby table and began to make my way towards the man, it was as if everything was in slow motion. The people rushing by slowed down, the flares and glimmers becoming blurry and running together into a muffled kaleidoscope, the deep bass of the blaring music radiating through my chest. I was Alice falling down the rabbit hole. The black-haired man tossed his head back ever so slightly, almost arrogantly, before slipping through the door and into the night. 

     My hands hit the metal bar and the door clacked open, and cold air rushed to hit my face. The back alley was illuminated solely by a broken neon sign and distant street lights, which reflected off of puddles on the cracked black asphalt. The door shut behind me, silencing the club music save for a resounding bass, which made the atmosphere that much more daunting. While there were usually a couple of people wandering about at this time of night, especially right outside of a club, it was oddly inactive this time. I was alone, standing in the middle of the wet alley, crossing my arms for warmth and watching cold puffs of breath float away. My mystery had disappeared into the fog.

     As if on cue, I heard a voice behind me.

     “So you followed me.”

     I whipped around to see the man in the dark jacket leaning against the side of the building, hands tucked in his pockets and staring at me with an expression that I couldn’t begin to describe - somewhere in between amazement and hunger.

     “You were staring me down in there - I figured maybe you had something to say.” I said in a calm voice I didn’t know I could manage, considering my entire body was trembling. 

     “You’re different.” His voice was low, and had an almost echoing quality about it, like there were layers to it. His eyes were even more intense up close, so impossibly deep and ringed with extremely dark circles. He was only taller than me by maybe a couple of inches, but his imposing aura made me feel so much smaller in his presence. 

     “Different?” I murmured meekly, and I gasped whenever his hand reached up to lift my chin. His fingers held my jaw and his thumb slid to rest on my lower lip, and he leaned so close to my face that I could feel his hot breath that smelled vaguely of copper. 

     “I’ll see you around.” He ended with the narrowing of his almond-shaped eyes and a small smirk, and he pulled his hand away slowly. 

     I closed my eyes for a brief second as I shivered, and when I reopened them, he had vanished. I was up against the cold brick all alone, dizzy and disoriented, feeling as though I had just come off of a drug trip. My head was swimming, and I had to take a moment to simply rest. So many questions were buzzing through my brain: Who was he? What was he? It didn’t seem like he was entirely human, as insane as it sounded, yet I knew in my heart that I was right. There was nothing normal about that encounter, and my chest was still thumping. I could still feel his thumb on my lip. I could still feel his breath.

     I decided to go home.

 

     The very next morning, I wasn’t surprised to be bombarded with texts from my friends. I woke up in my messy bed to the sound of my phone violently buzzing on my nightstand, and I clumsily batted for it with as minimum effort as I could possibly manage. When I opened the screen, dozens of notifications were staring at me, each to some degree of “Where did you go?!” and “Did you get laid or something?”, and some of them just repeating my name over and over. I buried my face into my white comforter, tossing my phone to the floor where I wouldn’t have to hear it if it buzzed any more. They were all used to me disappearing from “bro nights” anyway, so I wasn’t much concerned with letting them know exactly what happened.

     Right… what happened.

     The man’s face was still lingering in my memory, and the sensation of him was still a ghost. I burritoed myself further down in my blankets, frustrated by how stupid I had acted - I mean, who follows a complete stranger at a club into a dark alley?! Am I suicidal?!

     A chipper knock on my door made me jump slightly. Not even bothering to glance in the mirror, I stood up and wrapped my large blanket around my shoulders, shuffling through tiredly over to the apartment door. A peek through the peephole let me know that it was just my friend Amy, so my elegant cape wouldn’t be out of the normal. I unlocked and opened the door, gazing at the blonde in my hallway, and she gave a little wave.

     “Good morning, little boy blue.” She ruffled the cobalt hair on my head that had earned me the affectionate nickname, before inviting herself in and walking over to sit down on the couch in my small living room.

     “What brings you here at this hour?” I yawned, sitting down opposite of her. She raised an eyebrow at me.

     “This hour? It’s 2 in the afternoon, Ethan.”

     I blinked at her, trying to process. Yeah, I had a habit of sleeping late, but this was a little much, even for me. I glanced at the clock on the wall, which confirmed her, and hung my head down to smush it into the blanket and muffle my groan.

     “I’m gonna be late for work…” 

     “I think you forgot that it’s Saturday.” Amy smiled gently. “I want you to relax and actually have fun for once today.”

     “What are you going to do with me?” I questioned, skeptical. Even though Amy was a generally laid back and easy-going person, she could get a little unusual with her definition of fun.

     She could obviously see my wariness. “Don’t worry, it’s not anything weird like mini golf again. I just wanted to take you out to see this amazing art installation a local sculptor finished not too long ago. It’s very cool.”

     That actually sounded like a nice time. “Okay, steal me away, but let me get dressed first.”

     “I’ll be here waiting.” She gave me a tiny thumbs up.

     I went to change into my usual jeans and t-shirt, seeing no point in dressing up anything special for an afternoon strolling around, and gave myself a quick check-over in the mirror in the bathroom. Even after the unusual night I had, I didn’t look too shabby, and with a quick finger comb of my messy hair I dubbed myself suitable for human interaction. I thought to grab my camera bag on the way out, hanging it across my chest and patting the familiar flap securely. Even though I don’t consider myself to be very good, my main hobby is photography - being able to capture moments in time and preserve them forever is so cool to me. 

     When Amy and I left my apartment, I was immediately greeted by the bright sunlight spreading across my face. With how chilly the weather had been lately, the warmth of the sun was a welcome change, and it instantly put me in a much better mood.  We made our way around town for a while, and I snapped a few pictures of her, because I knew she loved it. We stopped by a coffee shop and each got a little something, and I found myself walking along sipping a latte and munching on a sandwich to make up for the lunch I had missed. 

     “Oh hey, look, it’s that flower shop I was telling you about.” 

     Amy pointed across the street to a shop on the corner with big glass windows, overflowing with flowers of every color on the inside. It was the prettiest adornment to the old building, and made me reach for my Canon. She decided to head over and I followed, and as we got closer I noticed that all the signs on the insides of the windows advertising sales and specials were written by a hand with a happy attitude, as odd as that description sounds. The whole place radiated good vibes.

     A little bell announced our arrival as Amy opened the glass door, and an Asian woman behind the counter greeted us with a cheerful hello. The floor was black and white tiled, and the two walls that weren’t windows were a very pale minty green, adorned with yellow fairy lights and friendly posters. All the rows of flowers surrounding us were so prettily arranged, delicately placed together in big fluffs of color and sorted by type. The nearest bouquet to us was a collection of soft pink carnations, and I took a moment to gently touch the delicate petals. The subtle beauty prompted me to raise my camera and snap a picture, and I smiled to myself at the thought of all the pretty shots I could take here. I could hear Amy starting up a casual conversation with someone, though I didn’t turn around to look to see who, and I continued down the aisle to do some more personal admiring. For someone who didn’t get out in it much, I had a certain love for nature. 

     Just as I was about to run my fingers over the satin ribbon of a glass vase, t he voice of the employee Amy was talking to was suddenly a lot closer.

     “Hey, is that a Rebel T5?” 

     I looked up and I was immediately startled. Standing in front of me was a man just a hair taller than me, with short dark locks and stubble, with the warmest brown eyes I had ever seen. But it was more than his deep pools of amber irises that startled me - it was the fact that he looked identical to the mystery man I had encountered the night before.

     I began to stammer, my head buzzing with endless questions, including just how this completely non-threatening man just a few feet away could ever possibly be that…. thing I saw. It just didn’t make any sense.

     “Y-yeah, yeah it is.” I managed, my mouth suddenly feeling dry.

     The man - who I could now see his nametag read Mark - smiled brightly. “Oh, sweet! I have the same one at home. Are you a photographer?”

     “I dabble.” I smiled back shakily. 

     Apparently, Mark could see that I was visibly nervous, and took that as a hint to turn back to Amy and continue their conversation. Whoever this confusing person was, he was at least good at reading body language, but that didn’t explain how he was identical, yet somehow completely different from my previous experience. All I had in my head were questions without answers.

     “Well, it’s getting a little late, and Ethan and I want to hit up an art exhibit before the sun goes down.”

     “Oh, I heard about that. I haven’t seen it yet, but I’d definitely like to.”

     My heart skipped a beat. Amy, don’t.

     “You could come with us if you want.”

     Dammit. 

     I saw Mark mull this over for a minute, seriously debating, before frowning. “Sorry, I can’t, I have to clean up the back storage room. We just opened up and the previous owners left quite a mess.”

     I breathed out a quiet sigh of relief and zoned out to my camera again, but I noticed the two of them exchange phone numbers. Even though my immediate reaction was to run from this, maybe it was an opportunity to figure out this mystery. I could learn about him from a distance and maybe understand just what had happened, and if I was actually crazy or not.

     Amy called me over, but before we left the flower shop, Mark stopped us. From a vase beside him on a shelf, he pulled two flowers, one a brilliant yellow and the other a soft white.

     “A yellow tulip, for someone as bright and positive as you.”

     He smiled charmingly and gave the tulip to Amy, who took it with a childish giggle. I felt a strong urge to playfully make a vomiting noise, but refrained, and instead let her have her cute moment. But then, Mark turned to me, holding out the other flower.

     “And a white daffodil, for the shy puzzle.”

     I couldn’t help but feel my cheeks grow warm, and I took it gently from his fingers. It was easy to forget my troubles when I looked up at his cheerful and sincere face and let myself be swallowed by his charm. It was enough to make me really question myself - maybe I was just crazy. Maybe it was a trip, someone spiked my drink, and I didn’t actually meet anyone in an alley. I had just stumbled home and passed out, and now I was freaking myself out for no reason.

     As we left, and the little bell on the door jingled at us, I turned back to glance at him only to find that he was looking at me too. His smile was vibrant and energetic than before, more natural and gentle, and he gave me a little wave. I couldn’t help but wave back, and when my heart began to beat faster, I realized that I may have very well been smitten.


	2. Lavender

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If anything was going to be otherworldly, this is what it was going to feel like.

      Amy had procured a date. It was casual, just lunch and a little trip to the movies, and she said it had been absolutely fantastic. I kept catching her texting him, and she would smile every time, and I couldn’t help but feel overwhelmingly happy for her. It was a welcome change of pace and change of mood, and even though Mark and I might have had an imaginary moment, it made me grin to think of how much joy he gave Amy in such a short amount of time. So, the next few days, I spent my entire afternoons mulling things over. I kept convincing myself again and again of three important facts: I had not seen anything in that alley, Mark was not that same man, and I had definitely not been struck with a ridiculous crush. The whole thing was too complicated for my simple life, and definitely not anything I asked for. By the fourth day, as I returned home from a long shift of car hopping, I had almost had any reasonable suspicion that the mystery man was real completely stripped from my thoughts. It was a relief to replace the possibility of a nightmare roaming the streets with the likelihood that my drink was laced with whatever the hell a majority of those party goers were tripping on too. But all understanding I may achieve in my life has to be destroyed, and I was just coming through the front door when I heard a loud thump come from my bedroom. Being scared to death of burglars, my heart immediately began to race, and I realized that I didn’t have anything to defend myself with. I behind the table beside the door and fumbled for the baseball bat I knew was hiding there, and slowly crept through the living room to investigate the noise. My pulse was like a rabbit’s and my hands were shaking violently, and it took every single ounce of bravery I could muster to peek through the door frame.

      Leaning against the windowsill, staring out across the city painted in the gold of the sunset, was Mark. Or rather, his doppelganger, who I never thought I would see again. The white curtains were billowing in the wind from the open window, which I suspected was how he got in, considering the fire escape. I could have sworn I locked it, but at the moment, I couldn’t be sure of anything. Seeing him in the light, it was completely different - he had no shadows to blend into, he was displayed for me to see, and despite this he still felt as though he was simply a piece of the night. He didn’t belong in the daylight, it just wasn’t his home. I realized I was standing there open-mouthed and stupid, gazing at him in dumb wonder, and I had forgotten that I was terrified of burglars at all. It was that same spell he had put me under that unforgettable night, the same allure of danger and fantasy, and it was difficult to come to my senses.

      “What the hell are you doing in my apartment?!” I squeaked, emerging from behind the door with my bat at ready. Even though my entrance had been very sudden, he didn’t flinch at all, and instead turned his head to look at me with a taunting smile, one eyebrow raised.

      “What? You’re not going to welcome me to your humble abode? I don’t appreciate the attitude, tiny.”

      I gripped the bat tighter, scrunching my face in confusion. “Who the hell are you, anyway?”

      He sighed and slid off the sill, tousling his black hair in a manner that I would have found kind of hot had it not been for the fact that I was scared shitless. “Well, I’m not HIM, if that’s what you’ve been thinking this whole time. No, he’s….” The man bit his lip. “Not like me. At all.”

      “Are you some kind of psychopath?! Jesus, you haven’t done anything to Amy, have you? And what the hell is wrong with your eyes? 2007 is over, Gerard Way.” 

      He scoffed at me, and came towards me with a confident swagger. He seemed like less of an intimidation now, but jesus, there was still something wrong about him. There was something dark swimming behind that devilish smirk that made my stomach uneasy. He reached for me, as he had done that night, to cup my chin, but this time I had the willpower to pull away. His expression did not waver.

      “I want you, Ethan.”

      “If you’re not Mark, how do you know my name?” I said, but my grip on the bat loosened with how silky smooth my name sounded coming from his mouth. This was all too much.

      He went to sit on the edge of my bed, sighing and leaning back, the orange from the setting sun shifting slowly as it faded to the twilight, and it seemed as though for a moment he phased out from reality. He gazed back at me, and I noticed her was gripping my sheets tightly.

      “You’re the only person I’ve ever met that hasn’t immediately succumbed to me yet. Which is why…” He gritted his teeth, looking off to the side angrily. “I need your help.”

      I was taken aback by the request. “Why would I help you, I don’t even know who you are? And what do you mean by succumbed?”

      “Like I said, I’m not Mark… But I’m a part of him. Trapped by him.”

      “Is this some sort of multiple personality type situation?”

      He sighed even more heavily than before. “No. I’m not a personality, you idiot. I am ME. But I’m stuck to this stupid man and I want out, permanently. I’m a manifestation of all his terrible thoughts, impulses, desires… I was created by him. And the suffocation I’m subjected to every day is unbearable. I’m so much more powerful, I have so much more potential, and yet he shoves me down his throat like I’m nothing.” 

      I leaned against the wall behind me, trying to sort it out in my head. So, he’s not a personality, but a manifestation… How insane is this guy? Then again, something about him seemed so off, so unnatural, that I might be persuaded to believe him. I decided to prod. 

      “I’m sorry, but until you can prove to me that you’re whatever you say you are, I’m going to treat you like anyone else who breaks into my house and call the cops.”

      It happened so fast. In an instant, he was inches from my face, gripping the collar of my jacket, his eyebrows furrowed and lips turned somewhere between a smile and a sneer. My whole body was assaulted by a massive shiver, and the copper-scented warm breath he softly puffed in my face turned ice cold. He was even more close than he had ever been before, our noses nearly brushing, and his voice was low and growling when he spoke to me.

      “I can give you any proof you need. I can give you anything.”

      My head was absolutely spinning. Lights were shifting, my throat felt tight, my fingers were frozen, and I found myself unable to blink. “I’m not sure I want to let you free.” I said, hushed. “Kind of like unleashing a demon on the world. I still don’t know what you mean by succumbed.”

      “I don’t kill them, if that’s what you think. I borrow them… that’s what keeps me alive. I fight against him constantly, and the easiest time to win is in the night. I use him as a tool, use his body, and I prey on the weak. I take their energy, put them to sleep, and I’m on my way as me for a little longer.”

      The whole thing sounded sketchy to me, but at the same time, I had always been a believer in the supernatural. If anything was going to be otherworldly, this is what it was going to feel like. Something deep inside my brain, something primal, told me. 

      “If you were ‘free’, as you put it, would you stop targeting innocent people?” A little nervous laugh came out at the end of the sentence, probably due to my attempt at suspension of disbelieve. He chuckled at me and nodded, obviously amused by my concern for those he had none.

      “I promise, Mr. Goody Two-Shoes.” He said in a mockingly sing-song voice, standing up from my bed. He walked over to the still open window, which showed that it was still in process of inching closer to nighttime, but he rested his hand on the frame and turned back to me.

      “By the way, Mark doesn’t know about me. I would appreciate it if you didn’t say anything, or that angelic asshole might try to get rid of me.”

      Before I could respond, I blinked and he was gone. My curtains gave a flutter and I suddenly felt very alone, standing in the middle of my room, still loosely holding onto a baseball bat. 

 

      I wasn’t very surprised when Amy called me the next day to tell me that she wanted to invite me out to go somewhere, and when I showed up a couple of blocks from the local ice rink, Mark was standing there with her. His grin was bright and inviting, and he waved to me goofily, and I smiled back and waved in response just as energetically. It was certainly strange to see him again with all the new information I had gathered, but I decided to just push it to the back of my thoughts and try to ignore the situation for now, if anything for Amy’s sake. 

      “Hey hey, are you ready to have some fun?” She greeted me, lacing her arm around mine. “I’ve never seen you ice skate before, but for some reason I feel like you’re going to look exactly like a baby deer trying to walk.”

      “Don’t judge me yet. I mean, you’re probably right, but, rude. Don’t be surprised if I’m fantastic, though.” I laughed. My attention, however, was diverted whenever a new man I had never seen before walked up to us. He was taller than all of us, with wide shoulders and a strong jaw, and his curly hair was peeking out from underneath a grey beanie. I had to admit that he was pretty cute, but I was also kind of confused as to who he was and why he was there.

      “Oh, guys, this is Tyler.” Mark smiled, gesturing to the new man. Tyler raised his hand and waved awkwardly.

      “Hi, I’m Tyler.”

      Amy greeted him with a friendly hello and I waved back at him, and Mark introduced us to him to break the ice. We began to talk about how we had met, and the conversation began to veer off naturally to just Mark talking about the newly opened flower shop, and how his mother was really excited about it. Amy listened intently, but I found myself slightly distracted, as I couldn’t help but still mull over the whole debacle the day before. My mind was floating out into space and I was staring off into the distance with no real focus, but I felt a little nudge on my arm. The two lovebirds were still in front of me, so it surprised me that Tyler must have been the one to try and get my attention. I snapped my eyes up to meet him, and his face was still the same expression he had had the whole time.

      “Ethan, right? I feel like I’ve seen you before - do you frequent downtown a lot?”

      He must have noticed how I was quiet and felt the need to start a conversation. I appreciated that greatly.

      “Yeah, haha, that’s me. I work as a carhop at the restaurant that just opened down there. I guess you probably recognized me by the hair.” I said shyly. 

      “Kinda.” He cracked a genuine smile for the first time since I met him, which instantly made me smile too. 

      “I don’t really wanna do that my whole life though. My real passion is actually photography.” 

      We wound up having a conversation of our own, and I think I might have gotten a bit carried away and started rambling. He was easy to talk to, a patient listener and someone who gave all their attention, which was extremely nice and kind of made me feel important. Of course, he talked about himself a little too, and it suddenly dawned on me that he was probably here specifically on Mark’s request so I wouldn’t feel like a third wheel. My appreciation for the both of them skyrocketed, and I began even joking around with Tyler teasingly. At one point while we were walking, Amy turned around to flash me a devious grin, to which I rolled my eyes playfully. It almost felt like two people setting their friends up on a playdate, but I didn’t mind.

      The four of us made it to the ice rink and bought our tickets, and I found that it was kind of an ordeal to get to the actual thing while you were wearing rental skates. I wobbled pitifully for a minute, but eventually I found my balance and walked with more grace than the rest of the group, much to Amy’s surprise. I even showed off and did a little jig while she gripped the side of the wall - she must’ve forgotten that not only did I literally work a job wearing rollerskates now, but I was also in gymnastics when I was younger. Balancing on anything was easy peasy, girl. Out of all of us, though, it looked like Mark was the one having the most trouble, which was absolutely hilarious. He would be balanced for exactly 2 seconds before taking one step and nearly faceplanting, and it didn’t help that he was laughing so much about it either. 

      “God dammit,” He said through giggles. “God dammit!”

      Eventually, we got on the ice, and it was all pure fun from there. There were some turtle-slow glides, and some spectacular spills, and even a few impressive tricks; most of all though, I think I was just enjoying being the best. At one point, Mark fell on his butt, and I slid over to help him up from his predicament. When he got to his feet, he nearly toppled forward, but I caught his arms to steady him just as he reached to grab me for stability himself. As we stood there wobbling for a moment, gripping each other tightly while he pressed his head to my shoulder, he began to laugh, and it was so infectious that I began to lose it too. His smile was so pure, so contagious, and he was just a beautiful man to begin with. Butterflies in my stomach began to form like a cheesy high school crush, and I couldn’t help my cheeks from turning a little pink. When he raised his head up to look at me, still laughing, I noticed his face was a bit red too, and I closed my eyes and absolutely grinned. I could hear Amy and Tyler joking around behind us, so to entertain them a little, I slid my hands down to grasp Mark’s and began slowly pulling him. He let out a surprised noise but went along with it, and I pulled off the amazing feat of getting him to skate along smoothly. Amy and Tyler clapped in mock amazement, to which Mark shook his head and whispered a few jokingly insulting things. 

      The skating continued for a while longer until our money ran out, and we decided to head home. Amy, having gotten a ride from Mark, disappeared with him after a hug and a goodbye, and I was left to what I thought was going to be a lonely wander back to my car. However, Tyler mentioned that he was parked in the same place I was, so he and I made our little journey together.

      We walked in silence for a few minutes before I decided to speak. “So, how long have you known Mark?”

      “Long enough. We’re pretty close.”

      I hummed, and I figured this would be a good opportunity to poke around a little. There wasn’t too much harm in it - either I would find something interesting that confirms my theories, or I would just be dubbed mentally insane by a guy I just met. “Has he ever been, like, one for the club scene?”

      “Oh, definitely not. He’s not too fond of parties or gatherings of really any kind.” Tyler looked at me curiously. “Why do you ask?”

      Now or never. “When I met him, he looked really familiar to me. About a week ago I was out at this club with my friends, and there was this dude there who was really weird, and even got all up in my face at one point. It wasn’t a fight or anything though, it was just kind of creepy. But the point is, he looked EXACTLY like Mark. Like, exactly. So you can imagine my confusion at the fact that apparently these aren’t the same people!” I smiled, and conveniently left out the part about him breaking into apartment to apparently explain things. I wanted to know what Tyler knew. 

      He seemed genuinely surprised. “Creepy. But I know for a fact that not only would he had not been there in the first place, but he wouldn’t be, uh, up close and personal with a stranger. When you say he was in your face, what do you mean?”

      “Oh, I just mean that he was a little too close to me while he was talking. Like, an uncomfortable level, you know?” I laughed nervously. “Kind of like he was hitting on me or something.”

      We found ourselves at my car finally, and Tyler gave me his number. I said goodbye and climbed in, a million different things going through my mind all at once. Tyler didn’t seem like he knew anything about it, which helped both the theories that I was either completely nuts, or this “other version” of Mark really was real, and very good at hiding the fact. I sighed deeply and put my forehead on the steering wheel, all my confusing and conflicting feelings churning. I needed to put an end to whatever he was doing to innocent people, and to be fair, being stuck in another person’s body constantly didn’t seem like a very good time. But… what if he planned on betraying me, inevitably? The idea wasn’t exactly a stretch. Some sort of otherworldly demon targets a gullible boy, tricks him into freeing him, and then kills him. I played enough horror games to spot a generic plot when I saw one, yet… A little voice inside me told me to do it anyway. 


	3. Datura

      I was determined to discover the truth of how to separate them. It had begun to worry me that even though, apparently, Mark had no idea that this other persona even existed, it could still be doing him harm in some form or another. The extraction of the doppelganger could not only benefit any potential victims, but also Mark himself. I began to make it my mission to brainstorm any potential solutions, everything from a motivational speech to a full-blown exorcism. Given the circumstances, it seemed almost hopeless. In the next couple of nights, I found myself laying awake in my bed, wondering and waiting for him to suddenly appear, and maybe gift me with some more information, but unfortunately, he didn’t show. I contemplated telling someone - anyone - but remembered that I would sound completely batshit.

      I rolled over and sighed heavily, clumsily pawing for my phone. When I opened it, the brightness of the screen blinded me, so I turned it down quickly with a squinty groan and shrunk down underneath my blanket to create a little cave for myself. Facebook was boring, Twitter was silent, and there was nothing new on Instagram, so I casually swiped through various websites in search of anything to occupy my time with. But, my evening took a sharp turn away from boring and into eventful when I felt a hand grab my ankle.

      I let out a shriek and yanked my leg back, flailing my limbs all over as some sort of ridiculous defense mechanism. I was trapped under that damn comforter helplessly, because apparently I couldn’t get it together long enough to calmly take it off, but I did manage to get myself upright and curl into myself. From outside the blanket, creeping in underneath, was a pair of familiar hands, quickly followed by a certain dark-haired face and a devilish smile.

      “Holy shit, you’re so jumpy. You’re shaking like a fucking chihuahua.” 

      I kicked him in the nose.

      “In case you haven’t heard, it’s not exactly a normal thing to have your ankle grabbed in by an unknown entity!”

      “Unknown entity, how rude.”. Even though I had kicked with all my strength, it didn’t seem to phase him beyond slight annoyance. “I’d like to believe that you’re pretty familiar with me.”

      “Unfortunately!” 

      I threw the blanket off of the both of us and tossed it to the corner of the bed, before crossing my arms and looking him dead in the eyes. I was trying to be intimidating, but even though I used to think of myself as pretty okay at that sometimes, he just made me feel inadequate simply by existing. His resting bitch face was truly a sight. Raising my eyebrows at him, I pressed my lips together, silently expecting some sort of explanation for his presence.

      He must’ve taken the hint and obliged after a moment of silence. “I’m here because I want to know if you’ve figured anything out. Do you know how I can free myself yet? Patience is not in my vocabulary.” Those last words were dripping with seriousness, and I could tell by his face that he did not intend wait around forever.

      “Mark, I-”

      “I’m not Mark.”

      “Then what on earth do I even call you? A completely different name? Some kind of shitty pun? We could go some kind of Hot Topic route - it would definitely fit your appearance, to say the least.” I smiled nervously, trying to use humor to cover up the fact that I was still terrified. “Something lame, like… Dark. It rhymes.”

      Dark, who I was definitely going to call that from now on, groaned lowly. “It doesn’t matter what you call me, just don’t call me Mark.”

      He began to creep closer, on his hands and knees on my bed, and I noticed how the light reflected oddly off of his body, illuminating the curve of his spine and the wrinkles in his jacket almost like an after effect, like the highlights moved a millisecond slower than himself. His brows were low and his eyes were boring into me, and as he got nearer, I found myself in the familiar situation of being far TOO close. I was tied in the knots of every thought that crossed my mind - he looked exactly like Mark. I was the only one, as far as I knew, that had experienced as well as remembered him. His jaw had the same shape as Mark’s, his nose had the same curves, his body was identical… and he could be all mine. Mark would never be mine. He was unattainable, an angel with pure intentions, someone who already had a destined interest in the form of my blonde best friend. No matter whatever flirtation there may be, his heart had already been given. But there was a mirror of him. No heart to give, no desire for anyone else but me, no possibility of only coming in second place, if there were even places to be had. He was Mark without the charm, Mark with added danger and unpredictability, an exact copy with eyes darker than the dead of night and abilities beyond my comprehension. He wasn’t Mark, he was more exciting.  My mind was whirling terrible thoughts, my body felt like it had pins and needles, and eyes began to slip out of focus. The whole world was tilting on its axis, until I sucked in a sharp breath. I was immediately snapped back into reality, and the feeling returned to my limbs, and I realized that Dark was simply kneeling in front of me, staring at me curiously. 

      “You have an interesting mind.”

      My eyes went wide. “...What did you do?”

      He leaned forward, lowering his eyelids and dropping his voice. “I hacked into you.” A smile tugged at his lips. “Well, not really, but… let’s just say, I brought any dark thoughts you were currently having right up to the surface. And I must admit, I didn’t exactly expect that.”

      I felt the need to defend myself, to tell him that that wasn’t actually what I thought, but I realized that would be useless. Because, the truth was, I had thought those things. How awful they may be set aside, it was me. I felt his hand reach up and run through my messy blue locks, brushing it back and his fingers sliding down the side of my face in the most gentle way I had ever seen him act. He got closer, so close that even at barely a whisper I felt his deep voice resonate in my ears, and it made my pulse quicken. His lips were almost against mine, and when he talked I felt them brush me ever so slightly.

      “So you want to use me just like I’m using you?”

      I couldn’t formulate a response more coherent than a jagged breath. This was wrong, so wrong, but I slowly grabbed the front of his jacket and gripped it tightly. He remained steady. 

      “You’re just as selfish as I am.” 

      But then, he was gone. I was holding onto thin air, breathless and flustered, and completely alone in my tiny apartment. I was stunned, still feeling the phantom of his fingers and the tingle of his lips, and I couldn’t even begin to describe anything I was feeling besides confusion and anticipation. 

 

      Tyler was the first person to text me the next morning. He wanted to know if I wanted to come grab a bite to eat with him since he was close, and I said yes, despite still feeling strange after the night before. It was beginning to become routine for me to block out everything that happened every time that certain man came to visit, and act completely normal the next day. I wasn’t sure whether that was a good thing or not.

      Getting dressed was weirdly complicated. I had nothing to wear that I felt was decent enough for my newfound friend, and nothing that really made me feel better about myself. Was I really that selfish? But at the same time, if we were just using each other, was it really that bad? It was a moral dilemma I was drowning in, but how moral can you be when the man you’re interested in is probably some breed of demon?

      I sighed and looked at myself in the bathroom mirror, thinking about Tyler and giving myself an inner pep talk on how to be a normal human being. No spacing out, no awkward pauses, just be smooth and suave… Yeah, right, me - smooth and suave. Impossible. 

      Before I left my apartment, I gave it one last look around, and assured myself that everything would be okay. Regular, average Ethan would have a good time, and not think about possessed, terrible Ethan for today. Stay positive. 

      When I got to the restaurant, Tyler was sitting at a booth waiting for me, and waved me over with a smile. I hopped over and slid in the seat across from him, looking around the place and admiring the decor. It was tricked out like an old fashioned diner, with black and white tile and red seats, unlit neon lights hanging on the windows outside and the walls decorated with vintage posters galore. The aesthetic was amazing, and made me feel like ordering an old fashioned milkshake from some guy called Pop. I smiled at Tyler from across the table, shedding my jacket, and noticed that he looked just as good as when I first met him.

      “Hey, you hungry? I’m paying.” He gestured to the menu, which I picked up eagerly.

      “Ooo, I’m being treated. I guess I’ll order the most expensive thing.”

      He rolled his eyes, and I decided not to be too mischievous and be modest for once. We both ordered the same thing and started munching right away when it was brought to us, engaging in fun and idle conversation. It was such a relaxing time, and he was so easy to talk to that it felt like I had known him for ages. His conversation was interesting and his words were meaningful, even when he joked around, and it made me feel so happy to get to know him little by little. I don’t know what it was, but I gravitated towards him in some odd way, like we were almost destined to be friends. This was the fastest I had ever really clicked with someone - even Amy.

      We stayed there for quite a while before deciding to head out, and I looked at Tyler a little funny whenever he didn’t go for the parking lot.

      “So, did you walk here?” He asked me, sticking his hands in his pockets. I nodded. “Well, I can walk you home, if you want.”

      “Didn’t you drive here?” I said curiously. 

      He smiled. “Yeah, but it’s not too long of a walk to take you home and come back.”

      Embarrassingly, I felt my cheeks go a little pink, flattered by the gesture. He would walk me home and then walk back just to talk to me more. So, we continued down the sidewalk, walking slowly along together and enjoying the afternoon. It was pretty chilly outside, typical for November, and those grey skies were plotting against us, because soon we felt little raindrops pitter-pattering on our skin. I looked up to the clouds and let the drops tickle my face, and when I looked to Tyler, I found that he was looking at me too. We laughed as the rain steadily got heavier, and wound up walking quite a bit faster in order not to get completely and totally soaked. My apartment building was only a couple of blocks from the diner, so we made it there relatively dry, but I invited him inside until the rain stopped.

      I offered him something to drink and we sat down on the couch, staring out the window as the weather outside got worse. 

      “Maybe you shouldn’t have been such a gentleman.” I joked.

      “Eh, worth it.” He took a sip of his water and closed his eyes, and I curled my legs up to meet my chest. It was a pleasant little moment, just sitting quietly while raindrops tapped on the window, and I heard the distant rumble of thunder. 

      Suddenly, lightning struck. It illuminated the sky, arching across the clouds in a beautifully aggressive bolt, and the whole apartment went dark. The only light was from the window, the dreary grey only slowly darkening, and I looked to Tyler in the dim room with wide eyes. Except, Tyler wasn't there. Where he had been sitting was only a blanket and a pair of legs, which connected to the looming shadow of Dark sitting on the back of the couch. He stared into the distance, not focusing on anything in particular, but he addressed me when he spoke.

      "Tyler has suspicions."

      I squinted, crossing my arms. "Okay, really, you need to stop just dropping in unannounced. It's creepy."

      Dark rolled his eyes, turning his body to face me. "Tyler is beginning to think there's something up with Mark. I've been a lot more… aggressive, in my desire to come out lately, and he's been showing symptoms of it. But I can't help it. I'm so close."

      "So, I need to get you out before you ruin Mark's life?"

      "It's not like I care." He scoffed. "I just don't want to be exposed."

      I smiled impishly. "… You care about him, don't you?"

      He stood and walked off the couch as elegantly as I've seen one do so, running his hands through his hair. "No! No, I don't. He's so giving, so NICE, so selfless…" He said those like they were dirty words, and even in the dark, I could tell his eyebrows were scrunched angrily. "But I can't risk coming to light. I can't, or else he'll find out about me, and destroy me. That's just the kind of person he is."

      "Well, if he's so nice, then maybe he wants to destroy you because you're pretty damn terrible."

      "Obviously."

      I unfolded my legs and sat on the edge of the cushion. "I want you to know that I've been thinking about it, and the only reason I'm helping you is because of the potential stress you could be causing Mark, and the fact that you have to use other people to wander around freely. Who did you use to come visit me this time, huh?"

      "The little blonde that Mark seems so fond of."

      Immediately, I felt anger start boiling up inside me. "Wait, you used AMY? Do you have no limit, you sick bastard?!"

      "Relax, she's fine. She's sleeping! I didn't do jack shit to her." 

      "Unbelievable," I put my head in my hands. "Unbelievable! Stop. Visiting. Me. If I had known that - "

      "But any random stranger I would've used in her place to see you before, they don't matter?"

      I sucked in a breath. Of course they mattered. Of course they did. But I couldn't formulate a response that defended myself properly, which only angered me more. I was so stupid. Of course he had to use /someone/ to see me each time… Why had I wished that he would come? I hadn't even thought of the consequences. It made me feel sick.

      He was now kneeling in front of me. "See? You're just as bad as I am. Just as selfish-"

      "Shut up!" I looked up at him, tears forming in my eyes. Only the slightest twitch in his eyebrow gave away the fact that he was startled by the sudden crying. "Get out. Get out of my place. I need space to think."

      "Ethan-"

      "I said, get out." The tears of self-loathing began to roll down my cheeks, and apparently Dark decided to listen to me, because only a second later he was gone. The lights slowly flickered back on, and Tyler was back sitting next to me as if nothing happened. He looked slightly spacey, but when he saw me, he snapped immediately into focus.

      "Whoa, hey, Ethan, are you okay? I know the power went out for a second, but…"

      "I'm not…" I stuttered. "I'm not upset the power went out. I don't know. I just…"

      I felt Tyler's arm come around me, and he gently pulled me to his chest. "Anxiety attack?"

      I nodded, not sure exactly how to explain it to him at all. I guess it counted as one anyway. My whole body was wracked with quiet sobs as I relaxed into him, embarrassed about having a breakdown on only the second time we had hung out outside of texting. But he didn't seem to mind as he held me, and I realized that he must have the patience of a saint. 

      After a moment, he spoke softly. "I know what these are like. You just start thinking too much and it all seems to compact, and then one little thing can burst the entire bubble. It's alright."

      I appreciated him more than I ever had. The whole situation was just coming at me like a freight train, and I found my limit. It happened so fast, but right now it was almost like a moment of realization - I wanted to take matters into my own hands. Dark would continue to use me, just like he always had… But I was going to be in control.


	4. Amaryllis

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You said I was different than all the others.

      Several days passed without any sign of him. I was genuinely surprised he listened to me at all, and it actually gave me some sort of pride that I was able to take that first step towards whipping him into shape. I was torn between never wanting to see him again, and continuing with my quest to make Mark and everyone around him's life a little better. The main thing that kept me going was the worry that something seriously bad could happen if I gave up.

      When Amy asked to hang out, I obliged, and it felt extremely nice to have an afternoon to ourselves again like old times, even though it hadn't really been all that long. It put my mind at ease to see Amy in front of me, acting just as normal as usual, even though she had seemed fine online anyway. It was just a visual confirmation for me. We walked around and joked for the whole day, visiting the park and the older parts of the city, before heading downtown as per tradition for a snack. When we passed the flower shop, Amy lit up and began waving as she saw Mark through the window, who was currently sweeping the floor. He looked up and waved too, and Amy took my hand and led me to the storefront and through the glass doors. We stood by the refrigerators as Amy asked Mark what he was up to today, and I couldn't help but feel a little jealous at how close they seemed. I looked at Mark's smiling face and felt myself naturally smiling too, but even when I was staring at those beautiful brown eyes, the images of Dark started flashing through my head. It made me feel so confused in so many different ways, and I had to look away and pretend I was inspecting a red rose behind the glass. Two sides of the same coin affected me so differently, and it was so infuriating - yet, it was also exciting.

      The universe seemed to thrust an opportunity into my hands. Amy had to excuse herself to go to the bathroom, which left Mark and I alone together. 

      “So, no camera today?” He asked, leaning against the glass beside me.

      “Nope, no camera. I figured I would be too busy today to take any pictures.”

      “Ah,” He nodded, crossing his arms. Don’t look at the biceps, Ethan. Don’t look at the biceps. 

      I was silent for a moment before I decided to carefully test the waters. I stared down at my feet as my heart began to thump, and I swallowed hard as I built up courage. There was no one else in the shop besides the two of us.

      “Dark… use me.” I uttered quietly, just loud enough to hear over my own heartbeat. 

      Mark looked at me, slightly confused, but suddenly my entire world was plunged underwater. I felt dizzier than I had ever felt before, the room spinning and my vision frying, shifting from black and white to oversaturated in matters of seconds. My knees wobbled and my breath caught in my throat, and I turned to press my hands against the cold glass behind me. Everything was numb, and then fell tingling - flashes of heat gave way to freezing shivers, I didn’t recognize my own surroundings and I felt like I was in a completely different body. I felt vulnerable, like naked prey fit for a feast, and at the same time I felt nothing at all. It was a vague sense of mind-numbing terror mixed with bafflement, but no matter what it shifted to, it felt so very wrong. 

      A rubber band snapped in my head. A dull pain in the back of my skull resonated through, my ears coming back from the muffled distortion of reality to a sharp ringing. I gasped for breath, blinking hard and slow to regain my normal vision, and I looked up bleary-eyed to see whether my plan had actually worked. Judging by the complete change in demeanor and the hard shadows on his face, I was successful, but it came with more of a price than I had quite imagined. My legs were trembling and I felt weak, completely drained of any energy, and it took all I had not to collapse on the floor.

      “So… should I ask why you attempted this?” His voice started off sarcastically, but then fell into a quieter, more genuine tone. “Or why you would even want to see me again?”

      I gave myself a second to recover and let my breathing return to normal.

      “You’re rude. You’re an asshole. You’re selfish as all hell and use whatever means necessary to get what you want, consequences be damned. You’re kind of an all around shitty person, and don’t know what personal space means in the slightest.”

      “Wow, you really know how to make a girl feel special.”

      I huffed, a piece of my hair fluttering. “Despite that… I still want to help. BUT. We’re doing this on my terms from now on.”

      He blinked at me, subtly confused.

      “Now, I have some questions. First off… every time you come out, you need to take someone’s energy to roam around. But, you can you sustain yourself briefly on your own, right?”

      “Yeah, that’s usually how it works.”

      “Okay.” I stepped closer to him, pointing my finger at his chest. It gave me kind of a rush to be so dominant for a change, but at the same time, I was still quaking in my boots. “You said I was different than all the others. I just demonstrated that. You were able to take from me without knocking me out.”

      “If you could see how pale you are right now, you wouldn’t be as proud of yourself.”

      “Doesn’t matter. You’re here, I’m here, no one else had to suffer.”

      Dark cracked a smile. “Oh, I see what you’re getting at. Every time I wanna dick around, you want me to come find you and use you instead. That’s not very fun, Ethan.”

      I glared at him, pressing my finger. “Watch it, mister. I’m still helping you. You just have to follow my rules.”

      “Rules are meant to be broken.” He grumbled, his smile carnivorous. “But alright, I’ll play your little game.” It was then that I felt my mouth tug at a slight smile in return. It quivered and fell when he reached and took my wrist, pulling my finger away from him and tightening his grip around my sleeve, and pulled me closer to growl in my ear. “I’m impressed at your confidence. Good boy.”

      He released my arm, and before I could retaliate, I saw Amy coming back down the aisle. What seemed like an entire century must have only lasted a few minutes.

      “Hey boys, didn’t get into any trouble while I was gone, did you?”

      “How dare you - I’m always innocent! I’m a perfect angel!” Beside me, the real Mark laughed, and it kind of jarred me to see that quick of a transition. I snickered at how ironic what he said was, which he took offense to and playfully shoved me.

      All in all, I considered the afternoon successful. Control was at least vaguely achievable - or at least, he might sort of listen to me, sometimes. Anything was better than nothing, but I still hated how much power he had over me in any case. It had begun crossing my mind that just maybe, with enough energy pulled, he could somehow detach himself from Mark completely, just like he wanted. This demonstration that I could withstand the pressure could be a sign that I really was the key to this. Still, though, something in the back of my mind was telling me that that was still not enough. He needed something to anchor him to reality, something strong enough to pull him away… Now that the ball was rolling, I was feeling stubborn. I would figure this out one way or another.

 

      “I don’t know, he’s just been spending more time alone lately. He comes out for Amy and I, but for the most part, he’s just shut in his room. He says he keeps getting headaches, and he looks like hell. I’d take him to the hospital, but I’m thinking that it’s more of a mental stress thing.”

      I sat next to Tyler in the front seat of his car, the radio humming a quiet local station as raindrops fell on the windshield. I kept track of the rhythm of the wipers while I listened to him, and watched the water-decorated street signs pass by. We were headed over Amy’s place for a game night of sorts, and since he was nearby, Tyler decided to come pick me up and drive me there. Besides the three of us, and Mark, I had heard that Amy’s roommate Kathryn might participate in the festivities as well, which made me smile - she was absolutely hilarious. Tonight was probably going to be a blast. However, on our way down the street, we had started up a casual conversation that turned into Tyler venting some of his recent worries, including about Mark. To hear that he had been getting increasingly worse, so much so that people outside of his own head were starting to notice, really concerned me. I was still working on a plan that could do several things: separate the two halves, leave Mark unscathed, satisfy Dark’s hunger permanently, and, well… actually work.

      “Has he tried yoga?” I joked, but judging by the half heartedness of Tyler’s smile, I could tell that he was genuinely troubled. “Do you think that maybe getting him to talk to you about it might help?”

      “I’ve tried, but every time I ask he says that he’s alright. He’s stubborn like that - he never wants anyone to worry about him, even if he doesn’t admit it.”

      “I know that I’m new to the game, because you two have known each other for way longer than I’ve known you, but maybe I could give it a try? It wouldn’t hurt.”

      He pondered it for a moment, adjusting his grip on the steering wheel. “Okay, yeah, give it a shot. Maybe by some weird miracle, you’ll be the magical savior that gets through to him.”

      “I am the savior!” I said in a silly voice, pumping my fist up. That finally got a real smile out of him, and I celebrated my victory by turning up the radio.

 

      Amy, Kathryn, and Mark were all already there by the time we arrived, and we happened to share a driveway at the moment with a pizza delivery car. Tyler and I hopped out and I bounced to the front steps, past the teenager with a Pizza Hut hat, my hands in the air. 

      “Pizza!”

      Amy laughed and dodged me to give the delivery man his money, taking the three box high stack from his arms and shimmying through the front door. We followed, making an excited dance party (mostly Amy and I) into the living room, where our other two members sat waiting. Three cheers for pizza, two liters, and a massive closet full of board games, amiright?

      The entire evening was one full of the stupidest jokes possible and much, much laughter. Pictionary dickery and Monopoly rage, way too much pepperoni and enough Coca-Cola to drown me, and a surprise bag of Doritos equalled a wild time, at least by my standards. Katheryn proved to be the Monopoly master this time around, while Mark came pretty damn close to flipping the entire board over. He did seem a little different than usual, a little more tired, but I did the best I could to subtly make sure we, myself especially, were cheering him up at least a bit, and it pretty much worked. By the end of the night, he was the same joyful person I met, and it gave me a sense of accomplishment. 

      By the time we all started getting tired, and the evening was getting late, we decided to call it quits. Mark, Tyler, and I all left together, waving our goodbyes and stealing a few stray chips before we disappeared, and Mark gave Amy and quick peck on the cheek. The night was cold and the stars were nonexistent behind the light of the city, and the streetlights were small orange beacons littering the sidewalk as we idly gazed off the front porch. Tyler made his way over to the car and got in, and I told him to wait for me for a couple of minutes as I talked to Mark. He gave me an odd look at first, and then a nod and a thumbs up, probably correctly assuming that I was going to give him some positive words before we parted ways.

      I followed Mark to his car, chatting it up about some highlights of the night, and when he leaned on the door to look at me casually, it caught me off guard how nice he looked in the soft glow of the street lamp. Tonight he was wearing a red flannel shirt, and his hair was a bit messier than usual, which I dare say was his best look I had seen yet. 

      “Yeah, that last time I got sent to jail, I kind of lost my shit.” He laughed that silly laugh he had, his hands in his pockets, and I laughed in return. It was absolutely contagious. 

      “Believe me, I was just as frustrated as you were.” I said, thinking back to how much money I lost. “I mean, come on Kathryn, it would be nice to at least give us a little bit of a chance.”

      He huffed and sighed, looking off to the side. The pause in conversation was a good opportunity to bring up the subject I wanted.

      “Hey… We’ve all kind of noticed that you’re acting a little strange,” I began, already knowing the answer to my own question. “Are you doing alright?”

      Mark seemed to slump a little, but didn’t give away much more than that. “I don’t know, dude. I just feel a lot more… tired than usual. Like something’s just draining me, y’know?”

      Oh, I knew.

      “But I think I’ll get past it.” He raised his arms up, stretching hard enough that I saw a peek of his tan skin underneath the bottom of his shirt. “I just need to reevaluate, stop being such a workaholic... probably the stress of having two jobs.”

      It dawned on me that he probably didn’t work at his mother’s flower shop all the time. “Where else do you work?” 

      “Eh, I’m kind of a repairman, I guess, but for computers. I fix both the physical part and the inner workings - most of the time, I just find myself cleaning hard drives and replacing fried parts.”

      I leaned against a brick mailbox behind me, intrigued. “Ohh, well maybe I should call you the next time my computer explodes.”

      “I’m the ultimate de-explodifier.” He grinned, and I found the way he made up words charming. 

      “Damn, we’re kind of a pair… Carhop slash photographer meets technician slash florist.”

      “I’d like to debate the florist part. I’m more of a janitor.”

      “Technician slash janitor.”

      “Better.”

      I chuckled at him, and bringing it up reminded me that I could play around a little with the lighting. I pulled out my phone from my pocket, opening the camera.

      “Hey, stay still for a second.” I instructed, and instead of doing what he was told, he immediately struck a silly, yet vaguely heroic pose, with his hands on his hips and his nose in the air. I decided to go with it anyway and snapped a few pictures, thankful that my phone camera was at least good enough not to be ridiculously low quality in that amount of darkness. When I flicked back to the photos I had taken, even with the dumb pose, he was still an amazing model. It gave me ideas.

      He went to look over my shoulder, and “ooo”’d at my screen. “I must say, that is one handsome devil.”

      “Don’t get too full of yourself, buddy.” I teased, pushing him lightly. “I guess I better get going now, considering Tyler is probably just twiddling his thumbs waiting for me.”

      “He’s a patient guy, he’s alright.” Mark poked my shoulder. “See you later, blue boy.” 

      I grinned, starting to walk away. The twinkle in his eyes put a skip in my step, like some sort of horrible romcom. “Later, huge nerd.” 

      Before I got very far, I heard Mark again, but his voice was different. Huskier, more echoing and otherworldly. 

      “See you around.”

      A cold chill crept through my bones and I came to a slow halt, turning around to look at him. He was exactly what I expected, his same old face staring at me, but those eyes were so different yet again. So dark.

      I threw my hands up half-heartedly, gesturing to him. “Oh, fuck off with you.” 

      He laughed at me, obviously just messing with me, and he draped his arms over the now open car door. The air of cockiness he radiated, even from my distance, was simply astonishing. If this would have been the first time I met him, I would have been absolutely speechless. But I thought that by now I was fairly immune. Barely. “Uh-uh, that’s rude. Watch yourself.”

      I rolled my eyes to the most extreme I possibly could and continued walking away, determined not to look back again. Unfortunately, for reasons unknown to myself, I also felt a smile creep over my face. Kind of disgusting that I found him so irresistible. 

      When I slid back into the passenger seat of the car where Tyler was waiting for me, he looked slightly troubled. A crease was formed between his brows, which were more furrowed than usual, and I could see that he had been chewing on his bottom lip. 

      “Sorry I took so long,” I began, buckling my seatbelt and leaning back. “But what’s wrong?”

      I watched his eyes and noticed that they were following Mark’s car as he left, and my heart began to thump. Had he noticed something different? No, of course he wouldn’t have, it was too dark outside. Did he hear us talking? Hear that smooth, ice cold voice? No, he was too far away. I tried to debunk it quickly but my mind buzzed with the possibilities. If he did notice something was wrong, would I lie to him? Would I call him crazy, even though he wasn’t?

      My anxious spiral was cut off by him speaking. “Nothing, just spacing out.”

      I could tell he was lying. His stony face was good for poker, but his voice gave away everything. However, I didn’t want to press out of self-preservation, so I hummed quietly and put my feet up on the dash.

      “Hey, get your dirty shoes off the dashboard.” He swatted at me, and it was a relieve to see that troubled look vanish. For now, I was in the clear, but honestly, for how long? How much longer could I live in fear, and sneak around behind everyone’s backs, just to help someone that has done nothing but manipulate. It felt wrong, in my gut, but I was already too deep to back out now. Betrayal had always been a threat from the beginning, and I went into this fully aware of that. I shouldn’t be having second thoughts about my commitment now.

 

 

 

 

_       He could still see the image in his mind. The small figure, awkwardly shuffling, the jacket that was too large for him and that bright blue hair that glowed even in the dim light. His scent was like fresh sheets and vanilla, a hint of coconut and the faint smell of the rain. His smile was angelic, he tasted like fear and determination. He was so fragile to him, at first sight nothing more than a toy to play with. But underneath the soft eyes and the playful humor was a soul stronger than any he had encountered. It made him hunger. It made him weak. _

_       He took more than he needed from the boy at the flower shop. A lot more, and it made him feel a range of emotions he’d never felt before. To see him shaking there, barely able to stand on his own two legs, was so delicious, and that was the greed he was used to. He wanted to drain every last drop, watch him crumple to the floor as he’s unable to fight back. But this one was special, and it was absolutely maddening. He refused to yield to the power, and actually took a lot more than he expected at all. It was the same resilience he had seen when they first met, and he felt the same intrigue and admiration. Ethan could stand him, be around him, talk back to him even - it was wonderful and infuriating at the same time. He was beautiful beyond words. _

_       He loves him. _

_       He hates him. _

_       He wants to kiss him. _

_       God knows they practically did. But just that one little centimeter, that one extra push… _

_       To watch Tyler’s heart break. To watch Ethan become his. To feel. _


	5. Hydrangea

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Suddenly, things were a lot more complicated than they had ever been before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (two chapters in one day, you're welcome :^) )

      It was about midnight when I heard a knock on my apartment door. It was quick and soft, like perhaps if I were asleep it wasn't meant to wake me, and it only sounded three times. I rose from the couch and peeked through the peephole, only to be greeted with Amy’s nervous-looking face. Without hesitation, I opened the door, and she immediately walked past me into the living room, clutching her jacket in a manner I had only seen her do when it was absolutely freezing. Her eyes were wide and her brows were furrowed worriedly, as if she had seen a ghost. Her blonde hair was unbrushed, and her slender fingers gripping her coat were visibly trembling.

      “Ethan, I… I saw something really weird.”

      Despite her shaken appearance, her voice was steady, like she knew for a fact that whatever she saw was real. My mind jumped a million places at once, thinking about every scenario, but I guided her to sit down slowly next to me so she could continue.

      “What did you see? You look awful.”

      She snorted, and it relieved me to see a smile. “Wow, thanks. But I… it’s hard to explain.”

      I got up to fix her a cup of tea, and Amy began to tell me about the course her night had taken, which was eventful to say the least. “I went to bed as per usual, just under the covers, minding my own business, but when I fell asleep I had a nightmare. I saw you and Mark, but… Mark wasn’t himself. It was like he was possessed or something. And he was grabbing you, shaking you, because you were on the floor and you looked completely passed out, maybe even dead. There was blood just, all over your face, and he had blood all over his hands… It was awful. The minute I saw it, I felt like just bursting into tears. It was so wrong, like something that I wasn’t supposed to see, and when I woke up my entire body was just shaking like a leaf. But the scariest part was that when I woke up, it looked like there was a man standing in my room. He looked like a shadow, all black, so I couldn’t tell who it was, but it was almost like he was phasing in and out of existence. Like, his silhouette was pitch black, because it was dark in there, but he had red and blue auras glitching in and out like a bad VHS recording.”

      I absolutely hated that I knew that what she saw was real, and I made a mental note to confront him about it later. For now, I was worried about comforting her, and about figuring out what that dream meant.

      “So after you saw the man, what happened?” I asked, leaning against the kitchen counter. She was a little less shaken now, but she still looked troubled.

      “He just disappeared. It was like he saw that I was awake and made a break for it. It was so creepy, mostly for the fact that I knew I wasn’t asleep anymore. I tried to just go back to sleep but I was too scared.”

      “Why didn’t you wake Kathryn up?”

      “I already wake her up too much with my bad dreams, and she was dead tired when she went to bed anyway. Plus, since the dream that freaked me out so much involved you, I figured it would be okay to tell you about it.”

      The tea was ready, so I slowly poured a couple of mugs and grabbed the sugar (more for me than for her). “And you didn’t want to stick around in case whatever you saw came back?”

      “Exactly.” She nodded. “Plus, I thought that maybe a quick drive would clear my head. It didn’t help too much, but it did calm me down slightly.”

      I brought the mugs over to the couch and gave one too her, to which she smiled and cupped it gently, obviously taking joy in the immediate warmth it gave her fingers. “So you were even more helpless looking than this before you got here?” I teased.

      “Don’t judge, I guarantee you would be just as freaked out if you had the same experience.”

      “Maybe.” I mumbled, taking a sip and wincing at the burning liquid, having forgot to let it cool down first. “This kind of sounds like sleep paralysis to me. I don’t think you should be too worried about it.”

      She sat in silence for a moment, gazing out the dark window across the room. I wanted to tell her that it was okay so badly, but internally I was already fuming. Why would he go to her house? Why would he be in her room, let alone give her nightmares about something that… I walked to talk to him about most of all. Was it a premonition? Was it a desire?

      “I’ve never had that before, but you’re probably right.” She sighed. “I mean, what else could it be?”

      We continued to have a chat that veered off into various subjects, and was probably a much needed distraction for Amy. But it bugged me that she didn’t bring up the dream itself again, because I really wanted to know if there were any other details about it - where we were, etcetera. Nothing about it could have been a coincidence, not now.

      When there was a long pause in the conversation, I felt Amy lean into me, snuggling herself up against my arm. It was such a familiar warmth, a girl that had always been there for me through thick and thin, my best friend in the entire world. We hadn’t been talking to each other as much as usual lately, and I found myself missing her a lot. Even though she brought herself to me in a moment of fear, I was thankful that I was able to have this peaceful little chunk of time with her, now.

      “I’m so worried about everyone right now.” She murmured softly, wrapping her hands around my arm loosely. “You’ve been so quiet, Mark has been sick, Kathryn has been gone more and more lately… even all my other friends are having issues of their own. It feels like the weight of the world is on my shoulders right now.”

      “I’m sorry I haven’t been very social lately…” I said, feeling sad. “There are just a lot of things on my mind too, personal stuff.”

      I felt her let out a quiet breath, and she closed her eyes. “It’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it. Shit happens sometimes. We’ll pull through, like we always do.”

      I smiled, closing my eyes too and leaning back against the couch. 

      “Yeah, we will.”

 

      When I woke up the next morning, I was still on my couch, and the sun was trying to shine through the mass of grey clouds outside. I blinked slowly and got up, yawning widely as I made my way over to the kitchen. In the sink were two empty cups, and a little white note with tiny handwriting.

      _Thanks for the tea <3 - Amy_

      That sneaky sneak drank my mug too - and then left without waking me up. What a goof. I decided to leave them there for now to wash later, because I was feeling particularly lazy, and returned to my bedroom that I hadn’t even gotten a chance to sleep in last night. 

      The shower was desperately calling me, so after I checked my phone, I hopped in before anything else. The hot water and the billowing steam felt amazing on my tired body, so much so that I didn’t even want to get out. I decided to take my time, soaking up the warmth from the running shower faucet with mildly enthusiastic dissociation. My serene experience was interrupted, however, by a thump from outside the opaque curtain, and a very slight cool breeze. I never wanted a curtain I couldn’t see through in the first place, for reasons exactly like crazy serial killers, but I had never been motivated enough to replace it. I could feel the presence of someone else in the bathroom with me, and I was terrified by the fact that I was both unarmed and completely butt naked. After a minute, though, the feeling subsided, and I heard the click of the doorknob as it shut. Immediately, I turned off the water, and thanked my lucky stars that I was messy enough to leave a pair of shorts laying around on the floor. Quickly, I dried myself off and threw those on, still keeping my towel close to me even though I didn’t have to. 

      When I opened the door, the steam rolled out into the chilly air, which was colder than it should have been. The sun has been obscured by a thick blanket of clouds, which threatened to unleash rain once again, and I cursed when I heard rumbles in the distance. Cautiously, I shuffled into the living room, eyeing my trust bat but unsure if I was going to make it there before I was brutally machete’d to death by some man in a mask. But then, it stupidly dawned on me.

      “Dark?” I called out, and what I got in response was actually a quiet snicker. Oh, of course it was him. It always was. I turned my head to the left and saw through the open bedroom door that he was reclined back on my bed, staring directly at me, grinning widely.

      “Boo, you found me.” He purred. I threw my towel to the floor angrily and marched towards him, and my face must have been fairly terror-inducing, considering his smile actually wavered before growing even more dangerously. I raised my hand as I was coming at him and landed a loud and violent slap directly across his smug face, and it hurt my hand more than it probably hurt him. At least it wiped that expression off his face, and I noticed his cheek turning red immediately. It was a splash of color across his dulled complexion that filled me with pride. If it didn’t hurt, it must have at least stung his ego, if anything else.

      “Ouch.” He mumbled, reaching up to caress his jaw. Success, it did hurt.

      I felt the anger begin to simmer inside me. “I have several things to say to you, SIR, starting with the fact that Amy dropped by my apartment last night scared out of her wits, and you are the obvious culprit. Explain what you were doing there, and why you freaked her out so much.”

      He looked at me up and down. “At least put a shirt on before I start story time, skinny.”

      I began to blush furiously and stomped over to the drawers, while he leaned back to lay flat across my comforter. “Start talking, dude.” I ordered, fishing for something semi-suitable. 

      “Alright,” He began, putting his arm across his eyes. “So lately, Mark has been worried about Amy. And whenever he’s sick, I get sick, unfortunately. I got curious and decided to pay her a late night visit, with the original intention of just observing for a while to see if she was okay. But my own mind was running too much, and she - she’s too perceptive. I don’t know how, but it was like she could pick up on my thoughts, my feelings.”

      “So… you were thinking about me dead?” I pulled a shirt over my head, not wanting to turn around and look at him.

      I heard a deep sigh and a grumble. “No, no I… Okay, yes. But it wasn’t a desire.”

      The tone in his voice shifted. I went ahead and turned, only to see him dragging both his hands down his face. “Was it a fear?”

      He pulled his hands down just enough to give me a piercing glare.

      “That’s why Amy was so scared. You were scared too, about what you were thinking.”

      He was uncharacteristically silent, and I noticed that the reality-altering aura he carried around with him was subsided. Just laying there like that, not swallowed in darkness, not staring me down with such intensity… he looked normal. He looked touchable, off his mountainous ego, the big bad wolf not so bad after all. I sat down next to him, a distance that we had already invaded but I still felt like I had to respect, and laid back too. The ceiling fan above us rotated slowly.

      “You’re scared that you’re going to hurt me, whether you admit it or not.”

      That sparked something in him. He rolled over in a flash, and in an instant he was hovering over me, his arms pinning either side of me. Even though I was helpless underneath him, I was seeing cracks in his facade, and I decided to be unafraid.

      “I WANT to hurt you. I want you to crumble.” He growled, his face twisted into an angry snarl. I knew that a part of him was lying to me. I could see right through him, and I reached up to grasp his jacket and bring him down closer to me.

      “You’re greedy, and you’re afraid of that.”

      “What made you so brave all of a sudden?” 

      Something about his words made me hesitate. What on earth DID make me so brave? He was perfectly capable of hurting me, I could see it. But perhaps the reason why I wasn’t so afraid anymore was because he never did, not really. 

      My fingertips suddenly began to tingle. My vision started to shift color, and as I stared at the man above me, so intense and so powerful, it was like I was thrust into a state of vertigo. Just like the flower shop, my breath was caught in my throat, and my bedroom turned on it’s head into a vaguely familiar world that was frantically spinning. The only stable thing was Dark, trapping me against the blankets and watching my face as I took a trip through various stages of consciousness in a matter of seconds. A wave of numbness flooded over me, and then the stinging pain in the back of my skull, and I squeezed my eyes shut as tight as I could to block out my swirling senses. 

      That’s when it happened. I felt him lower himself, felt his electricity against my skin, and his lips came crashing down on mine. It was rough, hungry, like he had been waiting a millennia to finally have a taste, and his cold skin was now burning hot as he slid one of his hands down to meet my waist. I returned his kiss with a sort of confused enthusiasm, because it felt so wrong, like I was committing a felony in my own brain. But when he broke away, his hair brushing against my forehead and his breathing jagged, I shamelessly wanted more. I was still off balance, my ears ringing and my face flushed, and I wanted to deck him for throwing me so such a loop. When I opened my eyes to look at him, he had a surprisingly serious expression, like his thoughts were trailing off in different directions, like mine did often. It was like he was having an internal battle with himself over what to do next. I made the decision for him. 

      This time, whenever I kissed him first, I was gentle. An indulgence I knew I might not have forever, I decided to treat this like a fantasy rather than reality. There was a list of reasons a mile long why this shouldn’t have been happening in the first place, and I metaphorically crumpled it up and threw it in the garbage. He was like a nightmare, but he was my nightmare now, and as I tugged harder on the collar of his jacket, the thought of taming the beast was extra hilarious. Mr. Rough-and-Tough McEdgy was all mine.

      The beast fought back. He slid up and tangled his hand in the mess of hair atop my head and gripped it hazardously, and as he arched his back, a deep growl rumbled from his throat. His frustration made the teasing all that much more enjoyable, as I refused to further it beyond the simple kisses. My reign over him was apparently not taming enough, though, because he slowly dragged his teeth across my bottom lip as he pulled away, giving me a wry smile. 

      “I still hate you.” I said, releasing his collar from my iron grip.

      “The feeling is mutual.” He grumbled, the smile still in place.

      And then he disappeared from my grasp once again.

 

 

 

_       The way he took control of him. The unspoken fight for power. The way he looked in the dim, cloudy light, and the way his lips were so soft. Maddening, infuriating, absolutely heinous - he should be on his knees in admiration, begging for his life. But instead he had him wrapped around his pinky, trained like a puppy rather than the monster he truly was. Awful, terrible, disgustingly humiliating. The way he spoke to him, so sarcastically, yet still with that underpainting of fear, was so incredible, and so tantalizing. He wanted to bend him open, expose every little corner of weakness, make him tremble. The sparks that flew when their skin met, the way he tugged him forward into that close of a proximity, he must have known that there was no other option other than to get even closer. The tingling, teasing sensation of him during their last close encounter was never enough, he needed so much more, and tonight he received. It was everything he had expected, the beating of his heart so obviously loud underneath him, the surprise and the acceptance. His feelings were like tangling vines, strangling him and binding him, cutting him at the surface with their thorns and bringing such wonderful pain. Ethan was invading every portion of his mind, making him feel things he had never felt, and craved so desperately, yet fought tooth and nail. He didn’t want to get soft and become - god forbid - someone who actually cared. At the same time, however, there was no stopping his affection, whether he liked it or not, and it would only continue to grow. _

_       Revolting. Delicious. _

_       If he wasn’t too careful, Ethan might actually have the power to turn him into a decent person, however indecent he may feel on the inside. _

 

 

 

      The sensation of Dark was still lingering on me long after he was gone, and as I was contemplating myself, I received a text. The notification displaying Amy’s name,  I decided to open it, and was greeted with a surprise.

_       peebs: hey, I know this is kind of out of the blue, but I felt the urge to tell you something important _

_       peebs: apparently, tyler likes you. as in, more than a friendly way _

_       peebs: mark told me that tyler was talking to him about it, and he said that it was pretty unusual for tyler to be so hung up on someone _

_       peebs: honestly, thinking back to the way he looks at you, it’s like a lovesick little kid. and don’t you dare tell me that you haven’t done the same thing! you two are practically a couple already with how many loving looks you give _

_       peebs: so idk what you want to do about it, but if you want my honest opinion, i think you would be cute together! that is, if you’re even interested…  _

_       peebs: i know the timing isn’t exactly perfect, but maybe going on a date will cheer you up a little, and distract you from whatever you’re dealing with right now _

_       peebs: and please remember, if you ever feel like talking, i’m always here _

_       peebs: now, go get ‘em, hot stuff :^) _

      I slowly turned off my phone, staring off into space as I went completely blank. It felt fake, like a prank, but I knew she wouldn't be that mean. Tyler... Mark... Him... The sweet morning texts, the milkshakes, the long car rides. The giggle fits, the warm soul, the kind heart. The dangerous dance, the fire within, the distorted reality. Suddenly, things were a lot more complicated than they had ever been before.

      Well, shit.


	6. Belladonna

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I can show you wonderful things, Ethan. Things that no one else can see.

      It was a friend date. I told myself that over and over, waiting nervously in front of the concrete steps while the neon signs loomed above me. The ticket man was eyeing me from across the sidewalk, as if he was waiting for me to either come and finally buy something, or simply walk away. I arrived way too early, because my anxiety was getting the better of me, so I had ten minutes of free time to panic out in the cold. I really did myself a favor, didn’t I? The night was slowly darkening and the chill in the air was biting harder, and I held my jacket close to me, clinging to it as my only source of warmth. My nose and cheeks were turning pink - whether from the chilliness or the creeping embarrassment, I couldn’t tell.

      The situation was convoluted: Amy and Mark were a couple. I had feelings for Mark. Tyler had feelings for me. I also had feelings for Mark’s secret inner demon who was bad news seven ways to Sunday. It felt like highschool all over again, save for the tiny detail that one contender was of supernatural origin. In other words, fuck my life.

      I thought back to the kiss. It seemed like some sort of twisted dream now, like it didn’t even happen but still left a ghost. Every time I remembered how he felt, it made me want to curse the universe that it placed such a confusing and so morally ambiguous situation on my shoulders. I knew in my heart that it wasn’t going to last, that perhaps I would be betrayed so awfully that it would crush me. But at least I was prepared for the worst.

      So, if by some miracle, something did happen with Tyler, would it be considered cheating? Or did the encounter not even count as reality? And since they were technically two different people, Mark wouldn’t be cheating on Amy by doing this not by his own consciousness, but the worry was still there. My head was beginning to hurt from all the questions that were forming, and again, I had one big emotion cover everything else: Fuck. My. Life.

      Okay, Ethan, focus on the task at hand. I bounced on my heels to get my blood flowing a little and gazed down the darkened street, though I knew I had no business being so antsy. Ethan, you are seeing a movie with Tyler. You have no idea what movie you’re going to see, but you’re gonna see it, and you’re gonna get a large popcorn to split, and you will NOT run away to the bathroom at any point because your nerves are about to explode. You will have a nice time, dammit. 

      About five anxious minutes passed before I saw his car roll into the parking lot, and I puffed up my chest and cleared my throat. When I saw him get out, my fingers were twitching with unnecessary anticipation, and I smiled and waved to him. He jogged across the lot towards me, and I chuckled to myself at how I saw stray curls of hair from underneath his beanie bouncing ever so slightly.

      “Hey, you ready to see this bomb ass movie?” I said sarcastically as he hopped up the steps, and he shook his head at me.

      “Relax, I know what I’m doing.” He assured, and we both walked up to the ticket booth, where the man behind the glass seemed relieved that I wasn’t a nervous wreck anymore. I fished out my wallet to ready my money and let my eyes wander across the listing of shows on the wall. All the newest releases, the majority sounding much better than the one Tyler had picked, but I was always a sucker for bad movies. “Two tickets for the 7:15 Love Too Soon please.” 

      I could see a flicker of confusion in the dude’s eyes for a brief moment, and I couldn’t blame him. No one besides awkward, sappy teenagers and middle aged suburban moms would ever pay real money to see this tragic tale of romance and angst, yet it was turning out to make a shitload of bank. I guess it’s target audience really liked it. It had a pretty good score on Rotten Tomatoes, surprisingly, even though it looked like the most cheesy thing I could possibly imagine.

      We payed for our tickets and headed inside, and the smell of movie theater popcorn hit my nose like coming home. I remember that I used to be paranoid about it, because of the unfortunate allergies I so possess - but after working at this exact movie theater for a short bit, I was never so happy to see the words “soybean oil” in my entire life. No peanuts, no worries, and I can eat however much salty-as-hell overly buttered processed popcorn I wish.

      Snacks and drinks acquired after a particularly long line wait, we made our way past the ticket taker and located our screen, and now the ultimate test was looming. What seats would Tyler suggest?

      “Those look good.” He said, pointing to a little cluster of chairs not too far away, but not too close, and in the middle of the sweet spot of the entire room. Yeah, alright, he’s definitely a good choice. So we claimed our spots and got comfy, but just as we settled in to watch the trailers before the movie, I realized I had to run to the bathroom. I excused myself and scooched to the aisle, and looked back at Tyler briefly. He gave me a little smile, and I turned away when I felt myself grinning back like an idiot.

      When I got to the bathroom, it was eerily empty, despite how crowded the theater had been earlier. My attention was caught by my reflection in one of the mirrors, so I leaned over the sink and took a moment to stare at myself. My hair was messy and I looked pale, which wasn’t working for me very well. I turned on the faucet and dipped my hands under the water before splashing the coolness over my face, hoping to diminish the tired look in my eyes. I ran my thin fingers up through the messy locks on my head, hoping to tame that particular beast as well, and I used the sleeves of my shirt to pat my face dry. When I opened my eyes and flicked them back up to the mirror, I nearly screamed in surprise. Instead of doing that, however, I let out a pitiful squeak and stumbled backward into the very man whose reflection startled me. He was nearly pushed back into the wall behind us and was just as surprised as I was, and I swiveled around quickly to chew him out. 

      “You’re really running with the idea of being my personal stalker, aren’t you?” I said, reaching forward to give his shoulder a shove. Dark simply looked at me, likely taken aback by my sudden fire. 

      “Oof, stalker. That’s a strong word.” He raised his eyebrows. “Thanks for almost knocking me over just now - it’s so funny how jumpy you are.”

      I frowned at him. “You’re a grade-A ass.”

      “Correction - I HAVE a grade-A ass.”

      “No comment.”

      The way he looked at me was agitating. It was like he was getting more snarky every day, like he was testing my limits. But the charm he put behind everything made up for it somehow.

      His expression wavered while I waiting for another comeback, and his voice dropped a little. I could tell that despite the grand entrance, he wasn’t in a very good mood. The circles under his eyes were darker than usual, and he seemed a little more unkempt. 

      “Are you on a date?” He asked, mocking me. 

      “No, it’s not really a date…” I trailed off, and I wasn’t sure whether that was a lie or not.

      His face didn’t betray him this time. I couldn’t tell what he was thinking at that very moment at all, no matter how hard I tried, and it made me a little uneasy. But just as I was about to say something else, I felt his hand grab my waist and pull me closer. It was a possessive grip, his fingers digging into my shirt, and I felt myself flush as I leaned against the sink counter for stability. His other hand went to cover mine in just as tight of a clutch, and I could feel him lean into me. It was a scandalous situation to find myself in in a public restroom, but somehow I figured that Dark used whatever kind of powers he had to make sure no one walked in on us. 

      “Good,” The room began to turn on its head as he spoke. “I don’t want to share.”

      Once again, in an episode of unreality that I shouldn’t be used to, colors began to shift and turn. Dark was outlined with blue, then red, then both at the same time - the walls were fading to black and the floor was giving out beneath me. I felt weak and fragile, exposed far more than I should be, and my whole body felt like it was freezing over. Where he touched me was ablaze, a stark contrast to the rest, and when the edge of my shirt slid up and I felt his skin against mine, it was a heat like no other. I was completely off balance and hit like a train with sensory overload. His eyes burned into mine as he watched me struggle against the powerful disequilibrium, but apparently he took all he needed, and the feelings subsided to a vague wooziness slowly.

      “Who said I was yours in the first place?” I managed to retort breathlessly, still recovering. My weak smirk was irritatingly devious, I could tell by his expression.

      “Shut up for once.” He snarled, his eyes flicking down to my lips and back up.

      “Make me.”

      The challenge was too much for him. He obliged, pulling me into that starving kiss that I had encountered before, and I returned the favor. But almost as quickly as it happened, I felt the urge to part. Dark looked at me confusedly. 

      “Kissing a mystery man in the bathroom of a movie theater while I’m here with another person is a little too wild for my taste.” I huffed, putting my hand to his chest to gently nudge him away. It showed how much his opinion of me had shifted over time with how he allowed me to do that, but he still didn’t budge. It was like he was suddenly made of stone, and my heart jumped into my throat.

      “What am I, the other woman?” His words could have indicated a joke, but his voice was stern. It almost made me believe he was serious. I analyzed him for a moment, his unnatural figure looming over me as I had become accustomed to, and noticed how stiff his posture was. Every muscle was taut and his hands squeezed to grip me more tightly. Behind those deep, dark eyes was a tint of something insidious.

      “Are you jealous of him?” I asked quietly, squinting. He didn’t respond with words, but with a harder pressing of himself up against my body and the moving of his hand from atop mine to my hip. I couldn’t go anywhere if I tried, and to be quite honest, it made me a little scared. His reality-bending aura began to appear ever so slowly, and he flickered like a digital glitch as I watched him. The fear I had felt when I very first met him was rearing its head, and I didn’t know how to stop it. He was dominating me because he knew he could, and I had grown a little too comfortable with tossing my words around. There was a line, and I had found it - and we both hated each other for it.

      “You’re mine.” I heard him growl. “You can’t resist me. How could I be jealous of someone who isn’t even a threat? It’s not like he can even compare.”

      I swallowed hard, not knowing what to say. A dull ringing was invading my ears and I blinked several times, but it only steadily grew louder.

      “You aren’t as drawn to him as you are to me. You could be out there, watching the movie, eating your popcorn…” His tone was bitter. “But instead you’re in here with me, because you know that I’m the only one who understands.”

      “Understands what?” I asked softly, my voice cracking.

      “You have desires in your heart that simply cannot be satisfied by such a run-of-the-mill person. He may laugh at your jokes or watch your movies, but think of everything I can give you. I can serve everything up to you on a silver platter - we can be gods, Ethan.”

      My mind flashed back to all the ways he had altered reality simply for his own gain. I had no idea what the true extent of his power was. It occurred to me that he could probably obtain anything he wished with one distorted smile.

      “I see the temptation in your eyes.”

      I hated how silky smooth his voice sounded. So easy to melt into, like molten chocolate dripping with a bitter aftertaste. 

      “All your undisclosed desires… Everything you could possibly fantasize. The streets wouldn’t know what hit them. You could be powerful, just like me, and you could do whatever you damn well please. Only for you would I be willing to share.”

      The idea of having even a little taste of his abilities would intrigue anyone. 

      “So think on it. Once I’m free, we’ll be unstoppable. Forget everyone else; with power like that, the only one you need is yourself. I can show you wonderful things, Ethan. Things that no one else can see. I know that you crave it.”

      He leaned in and gave my neck a kiss, which I didn’t expect. I was so frozen in shock from everything he had said and done that I couldn’t think clearly, and the feeling of his lips against the my exposed skin sent lightning through my veins. Just like always, he parted ways with me as swiftly as he appeared, leaving me in the dust and shaken. I hadn’t realized I had been holding my breath until I gasped for air, clutching at the sink in a desperate attempt to keep my balance. My face was pale and wide-eyed, so it took me a minute to figure out how to breathe again and act somewhat normally. When it registered that I needed to get back into the showing, I slapped my cheeks to give myself a little bit of color and quickly ran out the bathroom door.

      When you’re offered such enticing things by, well, pretty much a demon, it can leave you a little distracted. Tyler asked me what took so long in a genuinely concerned manner, and I just made up the excuse that I ran into a little bit of tummy trouble. I wasn’t exactly lying, considering my stomach was now in knots like it usually was whenever I encountered Dark. This time, however, my anxiety was creeping in through every little crack, and I had so much more to think about than just him.

_       So think on it. _

 

      The movie was just as bad as we expected, and I was baffled that anyone would give it more than ⅖ stars. Even if I wasn’t exactly paying attention (which I was justified for), it still stunk. But it gave the two of us a few laughs anyway, and overall I think Tyler had fun. I tried my hardest to be mentally present, which was definitely a task, and despite the circumstances, I had fun too. We blew through the whole bucket of popcorn and I balanced it on my head to carry it to the trash bin, which made Tyler chuckle at me and call me ridiculous. As we walked out of the theater, our laughs spilled onto the streets, and we traded stupid quotes all the way across the parking lot. 

      “Oh, Antonio, I just can’t go on without you!” I swooned dramatically.

      “Rosalie, if you love me, let me go!” He returned the dramatics, and it was even funnier in his low, sarcastic tone. 

      Chit-chatting next to his car for a few minutes, a had a bit of time to unwind from the tension that had built up within me. The air was cold, but something about it felt refreshing, and I was free to swing my arms and legs out if I so desired like some sort of goofy chicken. What can I say? I prefer to be free-range.

      At last, Tyler sighed, his warm breath creating little puffs of white underneath the garage lights. “Well, I should probably get going.”

      “Yeah, getting kinda late.” I said, stuffing my hands in my pockets. “Text you tomorrow?”

      “Definitely. And hey, uh… I had a good time tonight.” 

      The sheepish smile on his face was amazing. “I had a nice time too. See you later, Tyler.”

      “Later.” He opened his car door and I took that as my cue to turn around and return to my own car. It was with great relief that I sat down in the leather seat, leaning my head back against the rest and exhaling slowly. Everything went semi-smoothly, save for one particular part, which I thought was actually a major accomplishment. Social interactions aren’t so bad when you click with the person well.

      The whole drive home, I kept thinking about every aspect of my predicament. Tyler was sweet, sure, but I wasn’t sure I was feeling the same way that he did. And of course, there was the problem personified in the shape of Dark, who always managed to take me by surprise. Would he - could he - really give me anything I could imagine?

      I was still stewing by the time I got home, and after a quick change I flopped down onto the comfort of my bed and groaned loudly. I thought I left this kind of drama behind in my teenage years. It was so difficult to handle the weirdness of the situation all on my own, and to shoulder the burden of everything like it was my responsibility. I just wanted someone else to know about everything, so I had at least a source of venting about it, and maybe even some help! But my story was so insane that no one would believe it. Not even my closest friends.

      Maybe.

      As if the universe was trying to give me a sign, my phone buzzed. I checked the screen and noticed it was a text from Amy.

 

_       peebs: hey!! how was the movie? _

_       cranky: It was awful. I really don’t see how so many people dig this _

_       peebs: it’s not THAT bad _

_       peebs: i thought the ending was pretty good _

_       cranky: The ending was the worst part, you heathen _

_       peebs: don’t judge me, boy _

_       peebs: anywhos, what about the tyler aspect? was it a date, or a date-date? _

_       cranky: Honestly, it was just the two of us goofing around. I don’t think I really feel that way about him :// _

_       cranky: You and Mark can stop conspiring together as devious little matchmakers _

_       peebs: pfft, matchmakers? us? you must be mistaken my good sir _

_       peebs: this is just the way cupid works :^) _

_       cranky: Cupid can suck my butt _

_       cranky: He’s been messing with me a little too much lately _

_       peebs: messing with you? oh man, is there another mystery person in the equation? _

_       peebs: a crush? a lover? a secret wife that no one knows about?? _

_       cranky: It’s kind of complicated _

_       peebs: you know you can tell me anything, ethan… plus, i’m just feeling nosy and wanna know every little aspect of my best friend’s life _

 

      The opportunity was right here. I could spill everything to her, and I knew in my heart that she at least wouldn’t think I’m purely insane. She was probably about the only person alive who wouldn’t. But then came the complication of Mark. How would she react to hearing that her boyfriend had a straight-up demon inside of him, and that demon liked to mack on me in public bathrooms? If worst came to worst, she might be inclined to believe I’m joking around with her if I said so, which would be a good escape route if she didn’t take the story well. She had a right to know, and it felt wrong to keep such a thing from her all this time. So, for better or for worse, my fingers began to shake as I typed my message.

_       cranky: Amy, there’s something I have to tell you. _


	7. Iris

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Have you decided whether or not you’re truly insane?

      It started with a simple text. She was curious at first, wording what on earth I could be so serious about. I started my story from the very beginning, where I first met him at the club, and she was an unusual brand of silent. My adrenaline kept me typing, because my fear of her calling me completely nuts was quickly taking over. I talked about how he had felt, what he had looked like, how I was so certain I wasn’t drunk or drugged in the slightest. The atmosphere of that night still lingered in my memory, and I couldn’t stop myself from describing it in great detail. Around this point was when she called me, and the buzz scared me.

      “Keep going.” She said when I picked up, in a tone I had never heard her use before, and I obliged. I knew that my voice would begin to shake and crack from my nerves, but this needed to be told before I locked up completely.

      I told her about the day we first met Mark, and how taken aback I was by his appearance - hence why I seemed to react so oddly. Then his unexpected visits to my apartment, and how he explained everything to me about the situation. It was hard to tell Amy the same thing he said, because it was so difficult for me to understand in the first place. I told her about the appearing and disappearing, the reality-bending abilities, everything. The hardest part to really explain was his need for human energy, but I think I managed to get it out in some coherent way. In my defense, it sounded like the plot of some sort of supernatural mystery novel than anything. By the time I was finished, I had to remember how to breathe normally again, and my eyes were stinging with tears. I didn’t know why I was crying - maybe it was just the sheer relief of spilling my guts.

      “Hey Ethan?”

      I heard her quiet phone through the phone as I sniffled. “Yeah?”

      “I believe you. I’m coming over.”

      And the phone call ended.

      I did my best to hold in the nerves that were eating away at me, and wiped away the anxiety-filled tears that had begun to leak down my cheeks. It was hard to tell whether she was honest with her words or not, but my gut feeling told me that she was. It overjoyed me to know that she might not think I was absolutely batshit, unless she showed up on my doorstep with a brigade of paramedics. All I could do was sit on my couch and wait for her.

      In the silence that was filled with only the faint sound of my breathing and the traffic rolling by outside, I heard a floorboard creak. At this point, I didn’t even bother to look up, because I already knew exactly who it was.  
      “I told Amy about you. She’s coming over.” I mumbled into my folded hands, and I squeezed my eyes shut. I received nothing but the quiet in response, which was somehow worse that any snarky retort I could’ve gotten. His footsteps were lighter than I expected, and I could sense his presence right beside me. There were no words, only the sensation of him sitting on the couch and leaning backwards, putting his arm over the back and behind myself. With the way he was sitting, I felt the strongest urge to lean over and lay under his arm, cuddled against him even though I knew he offered no sense of true safety. So instead I stayed leaned forward, my elbows on my thighs, and kept waiting.

      He sighed heavily, which prompted me to open my eyes and gaze over my shoulder at him. He was staring at the ceiling, his aura just barely a discolored shadow around his edges, but as I watched, it was flickering and dying. I couldn’t tell at all what he was thinking, let alone what he was feeling, and it made me nervous. Was he angry at me? Did he think I was an idiot?

      “I guess it was going to happen eventually.” 

      His sudden words made me realize I was staring at him, so I turned back to face forward. He was right - I guess it just happened sooner rather than later. Even though deep in my heart I knew things would be okay, I already felt the regret creeping in. There was too much to worry about here, and too much that could go wrong. Oh, I was taking control of the situation alright, just like I had sworn to myself - but it was terrifying. 

      “Should I leave, or should I stick around for the show?”

      “You’re asking my opinion?” I fired back. Even though my volume was low, it sounded a lot more aggressive than I intended. 

      He stood up from the couch and crossed his arms, peering out the window. “You know, it doesn’t really help you sound more provoking whenever you look like a 90-pound twink. That is, if you’re actually trying to start an argument right now.”

      I followed his lead and stood up as well, getting increasingly annoyed. “Look - okay, I don’t want to fight. I just want this to be over. I want the threat of innocent people being preyed on to disappear, and I want you to stop tearing Mark apart from the inside, whether you mean to or not. I want to stop going around behind everyone’s backs and having our little ‘encounters’ all the while not having any solutions for the main problem! If… If telling Amy about you will lead to finding a way to fix this sooner, then fine.”

      “You act as though I’m such a burden to you, but I don’t hear you complaining one bit when you’ve got me wrapped around your pretty little finger.”

      The room fell quiet. I was struck a little speechless, trying to understand what he said. Did he mean that, in essence, I actually did have power over him? But I was shocked less and less as all the pieces fell into place in my head - his jealousy was my leverage because his feelings were genuine. Offering me a taste of godhood wasn’t simply a manipulation tactic. And as I saw him, standing there looking away from me, I had to recall every moment we’d had. His desire for possession of me had been clear from the start, but to think that it was something more than a desire to own someone just simply had me floored. He toyed with me as much as he liked because he didn’t know how else to cope with it, much less how to be honest. His over-dramatic tendencies were making up for the fact that he was feeling something real and he didn’t know how to react. He let me have free reign and talk back when he could wrap his hands around my throat just as easily. Maybe, this whole time, I had known. Like there was something that clued me into the fact that he was putting up a mask, but I just didn’t want to accept it.

      And they say romance is dead.

      My plan was to say something cool or witty, but I was interrupted by a knock at the door. Knowing that it was Amy, I abandoned by thoughts and went to let her in. When I saw her standing in the hall, she was clutching a folded umbrella, which clued me into the fact that it had started lightly raining outside. I was so absorbed in my own worries that I hadn’t even noticed. She walked in slowly past me without saying a word, and after the door clicked shut, I half expected Dark to still be standing there. But, as he had many times before, he had disappeared without a trace, and it was just Amy and I alone.

      She turned around, and her brows were knitted as she looked at me seriously. She reached to place one hand on my shoulder, and looked me dead in the eye.

      “Are you telling the truth? About all of this?”

      I found myself unable to break her eye contact. “I don’t know how I could make this up, Amy.”

      It seemed as though she was searching for something. Maybe it was an indication that I was honest, or maybe it was her desperately trying to find something that she could call a lie. Her eyelashes fluttered as she stepped back from me, blinking away what I could only assume would be denial, and she sat down on the arm of the couch. Her hands were tucked away in the sleeves of her sweater, and when she peered at me from underneath her blonde curtain of hair, she suddenly looked very vulnerable. 

      “I’ve been having dreams more and more frequently. It’s always something related to Mark, something terrible happening that I can’t stop. And when I wake up, I feel so scared. It’s so real. And lately, he’s been acting so weird, like he’s a completely different man than the one I met. One time… one time I could swear that his eyes had changed. I thought I was going crazy. I even told Kathryn, and she just said that I needed to stop drinking so much coffee, but I could feel that this was different.”

      She paused, and I could see her ball her fists underneath her shirt. “But, even with the evidence… I just can’t bring myself to trust anything about this unless I see… him. With my own eyes. I need solid proof that we’re not both just part of some fucking shared hallucination. But Ethan, to think that you’ve been dealing with this alone the whole time -”

      Her words failed her as I swooped in for a tight embrace. My arms wrapped around her and she returned the gesture, and I decided that I just wanted to stay like that forever if I could. The fact that she had been suffering too, seeing such terrible things, and both of us had been too afraid to say anything tugged at my heartstrings. So when I buried my face in her shoulder and she held me close, I was reminded of how much I cared for her. My overflowing emotions were getting the better of me, and I knew that the tears would threaten me once more, but I didn’t care. I was safe here, she was safe, and together we could solve this once and for all.

      “The two of you make quite the powerful duo.” 

      We let go of each other and Amy stood quickly in surprise, and I clutched her forearm for support. Dark was back, standing by the window as he had been when he left, and the clouds outside behind him were now a deep, dark grey. Lightning danced in the distance, making the scene that much more eerie. 

      “You can resist me,” He began, pointing to me. He then moved to Amy. “And you can sense me. I think I picked the right people to be around.”

      Even though the room had darkened, we could still make out his features. The unmistakable tired circles, the dastardly smile, and that mess of hair I had grown familiar with. He certainly made a show of revealing himself to her, which made me wonder if he had been so dramatic with me as well, and I was just too wrapped up in the moment to have noticed. Probably.

      He flickered and glitched, his outline seemingly not fitting in with the rest of the real world, like he didn’t really belong in this plane of existence. He moved slowly as well, a creature who had power and knew it, and it really began to irritate me just how much of an act he was putting on. 

      “I already told her about how your bark is worse than your bite.” I said without a thought. He threw up his hands and rolled his eyes.

      “Well, excuse me for wanting to introduce myself properly.” He said in a huff. 

      Next to me, Amy put her hand over her face. “Oh boy. So you really aren’t that much different after all.” She sighed shakily.

      Apparently, he took offense to that statement. In an instant, he was directly in front of her, his gaze piercing and his posture threatening. His sudden movement made Amy flinch, and I could practically see the sweat begin to roll down her forehead. It reminded me of how terrified I used to be - how I still was sometimes. 

      “I’m nothing like him.” Dark rumbled, tilting his head to the side. “If anyone could see that, it would be you.”

      “Okay, hey, cut it out.” I frowned, putting my hand on his chest. The look he gave me after I said that made my breath catch in my throat, but his utterly animalistic vibes died down after a minute or so. Yep, wrapped around my pretty little finger, it would appear. It almost made me feel bad.

      “So now you’ve seen me.” He said, electing to ignore me for now. “Have you decided whether or not you’re truly insane?”

      Amy, who had stepped partially behind me in moment of panic, now slowly stepped forward and bit her lip. She looked off to the side, her swirling thoughts visible through the trembling of her fingers. It was certainly a lot to take in, and she seemed to be handling it a lot better than I had in the beginning, which wasn’t surprising. Between the two of us, she had always been the stronger one. “How do I know that this isn’t just some mean prank?”

      “You know I would never do that to you.” I said.

      She rubbed her eyes and threw her head back, turning on her heel. “Ugh! This is too much, too confusing -”

      “Let me make it simple for you.” Dark had decided to make himself at home on the couch cushions, and he folded his hands over each other as he addressed us. “I’m trapped inside your boyfriend. I need to get out. Ethan is helping me. You can decide to help me too, if you so wish.”

      “Okay, okay, let’s pretend for a minute that I can actually think clearly. So, we need to get you out because you’re hurting yourself and everyone around you, but we have no idea how to do that, and we’re supposed to just trust you?”

      It did sound crazy, in her defense.

      “I would like to think the trust could be mutual. After all, I’m putting my entire existence in your hands.”

      He had a point, and for some reason I had never realized that he must actually trust me in some way. I guess today was just the day for realizing things.

      “I do have one question, though.” Amy sat back down on the arm of the couch. “If and when you’re separated… What the hell happens to Mark? What happens to you? Do you just go through some sort of freaky mitosis?”

      “Essentially. But it has more of a flair.” He smiled. “Don’t worry, your precious Mark will be perfectly fine.”

      “If I help you, will the nightmares stop?” Her tone was somewhere between determined and frustrated, and it was only now that I noticed how pale she had gotten. She looked sick, like she hadn’t had a good night’s sleep in a month, and that was probably literal considering what she had been saying. I cursed Dark for affecting her like this, even if he hadn’t meant to in the first place. 

      “You shouldn’t even be having dreams like these in the first place. But I would guess that yes, if you ‘fix’ me, so to speak, your problems will be solved. You’re already involved, whether you like it or not, so you need to decide whether you’ll be helpful or useless.”

      The biting comment made it nerve-wracking to wait for her answer. The inside of my cheek was being absentmindedly chewed raw, as the tension in the room was virtually tangible. It stretched on for what felt like ages until she finally spoke, her voice filled with fire.

      “I’ll help you. But I want to make it very clear that you don’t mean much to me at all. Jeez, I love Mark, and I love Ethan, and I am doing this for their sake. Not yours. All you’ve done to me from the beginning has been hurtful, from your nighttime visits - which I DIDN’T ask for, and frankly, find quite creepy - to your awful attitude during this entire conversation. I don’t appreciate it!”

      Dark looked like a child being told off. A dark, brooding, angsty child. It was actually funny to see Amy call him out like that, but I think my presence was the only thing keeping her from serious bodily damage. He knew that if he retaliated, he would lose me.

      “So now that we’ve got everything sorted out,” I spoke up. “What do we do now?”

      “Uhh… try to get both of our boyfriends unstuck together?”

      Dark chuckled. I did not.


	8. Aster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something akin to tenderness.
> 
> (sorry for the delay! class finals, yikes. anyway, more regular updates should be back.)

      “Alright, pull!”

      “This isn’t going to work, you fucking idiots!”

      Clutching Dark’s arm tightly, I planted my feet firmly on the floor and yanked with all my might. Across from me, Amy mirrored my actions, her face twisted into a determined grimace.

      “C’mon Mark, fight it. Fight him.” She groaned, throwing her head back. It was a ridiculous idea in the first place - just simply apply brute force and try to literally split them apart. By some miracle and some weird demonic magic bullshit, it could theoretically be possible to rip the second entity from the first with a combination of physical strength and mental willpower. But, that’s just trying to put logic behind it. Really, we had just run out of ideas. In the past three hours, we had put our heads together in a massive brainstorm attempt, but produced zero results. It didn’t help that our subject wasn’t exactly the easiest person to work with anyway. We had tried all different kinds of sweet-talking, including a heartfelt motivational speech from Amy, but it was all met with simply a grumpy expression. I knew that it might be a bad idea to keep him around for so long, but we needed to come up with a solution quickly. So, even though I felt the occasional massive tug on my consciousness and sense of balance, I powered through. I could tell he was holding back as much as he could, which I was deeply thankful for. Judging by how exhausted and sick I looked in the mirror, I would go easy on me too out of sheer pity.

      Even though I was acting as a human battery, I think it was Amy who was the most emotionally tired of us all. I couldn’t blame her, because this all was a lot to take in in such a short period. But goddamn, she was a trooper, and as time went on I noticed she seemed to grow more and more confident facing Dark head-on.

      “Enough, enough.” Aforementioned man rolled his eyes, taking back his arms from us in one easy tug. “Not only is this a stupid idea, but even if it was going to work, there’s no way Captain Tiny and Sargent Barbie are going to accomplish it.”

      I was amazed that Amy took no visible offense, which was more than I could say for myself. “Hey, I am NOT that small!”

      “Whatever. I’m just kind of feeling like I should maybe get a break at some point? Your constant blabbing and prodding gets old really quick.”

      “He’s right, we should quit for now.” Amy ran her fingers through her hair. “Maybe we can just try again tomorrow, and use tonight to recharge our brains. I know I would benefit from some processing time.”

      From how tired we all looked, it was an easy decision to make. Amy shrugged on her sweater and grabbed her umbrella sluggishly, while Dark wandered his way over to the kitchen to peer in the cabinets. I walked Amy to the door, and when she was halfway out, she turned to me and pulled me close.

      “Should we tell Kathryn and Tyler?” She whispered. I’d be lying if I said the thought of telling Tyler hadn’t crossed my mind numerous times before.

      “... I don’t think so. At least, not yet. Not until we figure everything out.” I said. She nodded understandingly and waved a small goodbye, and I closed the door behind her quietly.

      When I got back to the kitchen, I saw that Dark was bent the small kitchen island, elbow deep in a box of cereal. He was munching away with a distant look in his eyes, like he was thinking about something.

      “Who said you could invade my Cheerios?” I leaned over the counter and attempted to snatch them away, but I was too tired and slow to succeed. He raised them up out of my reach and arched his eyebrows.

      “I’m a guest. I can eat whatever I want.”

      “That’s not how that works.”

      He closed the box pointedly and set it down, all while frowning loudly at me. I was happy to have made my point, and any small victory must be celebrated. I pulled away to go wandering on back to my room, where I greeted my bed like an old friend. My flop down into the comfy mattress was not without flourish, and I let out an exhausted groan when I felt the softness cradle me. It was so very tempting to just fall asleep like that, but I knew the warmth of my blanket was calling me, and I didn’t even stop to think about banishing Dark from my abode. He would either hang around to eat my cereal, up and vanish completely, or come in here after me to bug me before taking his leave. None of those options I entirely objected to except for the cereal one.

      It took great effort to haul myself up to climb into bed properly, but once I did, it felt amazing. I snuggled down into the sheets safe and sound, and I yawned whenever my head rested on my pillow. I fell asleep quickly, giving no thought to anything but getting some good rest.

 

      An odd sensation woke me up. As my sleepy eyes opened, I noticed the rain tapping on the window and the low rumble of thunder in the distance, which was actually quite comforting. But the gentle storm outside wasn’t what disturbed my sleep. An arm was resting across my waist, wrapped around me carefully and over the blanket I was hogging rather than under it. It didn’t take a detective to know who it was, although I was pretty surprised. I tugged on the blanket as I rolled over underneath, which caused him to stir. I managed to turn around in time  to see him open his eyes, and it made me nearly giggle to see such an edgy person in such a gentle and vulnerable state. I savored this moment I had, where his eyes were half-lidded and his face was free of creased brows and frowns. It was as true as it had always been that he was definitely a different person than Mark, and I found myself loving those tiny differences that I could spot. His hair was a little more black, maybe just a little longer, and it fluffed itself over the sheets. His skin was a little more pale, painted with cooler undertones and unfairly smooth. His cheeks were a bit more sunken and his stubble was a bit more prominent, and of course his eyes made all the difference in the world. The dark circles were still there even in his sleep, and as he began to open them, I was greeted by that deep, dark brown. While Mark's eyes were so bright and lively, always catching the sunlight and glittering with humor, Dark's eyes were more subtle. They were like pools of the pitch black night sky, mysterious and mystical and so very easy to get lost in. 

      "What are you staring at?" He mumbled tiredly, withdrawing his arm. 

      "I didn't know you could sleep." I squinted, slowly fumbling around with the comforter. 

      "'Cause I've been leeching you this whole time." His sleepy face was graced with a tiny smirk, which I found irritatingly cute and cutely irritating. "I guess this is my cue to go…"

      Before he could move, I raised the blanket up high and tossed it over his body, enveloping him in the warmth. I curled up against him, folding my arms and slightly shivering at the cold air I had let in from my kidnapping. He was stiff at first, unmoving and unsure of what to do, but as the comfortable silence continued on, I could feel him relax again.

      "Hush. Just enjoy the moment." I could feel myself drifting off again, and his strong arms went to wrap around me cautiously. Everything felt so warm all of a sudden, so secure and good, and I fell back into dreamland once more.

 

      I dreamt about him. We were running through a wide field, the tall grass tickling my arms I grinned widely. I heard him sprinting behind me, but I dared not look back. It seemed as though everything was glowing, so soft and light and beautiful, and the sun was low in the sky. I ran for a bit before coming upon a large clearing, where the grass was shorter and dotted with tiny violets and clovers, and I came to a stop to admire it. However, soon I felt two hands push against me and knock me over, and I went tumbling down ungracefully as ever. When I blinked and looked up, I saw him kneeling over me, with his arms on either side of my shoulders. There was something about him that seemed lighter, happier, than he had ever been - yet, he was still a different person than Mark could ever be. This face was familiar, and so frustrating sometimes. But the frustration was not without the deepest shade of an unfolding story that some might call a crush, and others might call love. Even I couldn’t understand it, but this person who had started out as a threatening stranger had turned out to be dear to me somehow, whether I liked it or not.

      When he rolled over to lay beside me and turned his head, the small smile that graced his face was unlike any I had ever seen him give. It wasn’t sarcastic or cocky, but instead genuinely happy. It looked so out of place, but it felt satisfying. Like I had done something right. 

      But suddenly, I felt sick. The orange painted sky above us was fading quickly into a dangerous grey, and the breeze that had rolled over us was now daring to turn into a howling wind. The blades of grass were rolling like waves, and my ears were filled with radio static that muffled out anything else. My breath quickened as I began to fill with fear, and it felt as though my entire body was paralyzed. Red and blue outlines flickered in and out of my vision, and something warm and wet began trickling from my nose. Even though I couldn’t move anything else, I managed to will my arm upward to wipe my face. When I pulled my hand back, it was streaked with bright crimson.

      He wasn’t there anymore. I was alone, lying helplessly below the churning storm. Lightning began to strike and thunder roared below the tones of white noise, and all I could do was brace for it.

 

      _Magnetic. That was the only way he could describe him. No matter how much his inner voice screamed at him to not get close, he couldn’t help but find himself disobeying. It was a bad habit he couldn’t kick, an addiction he couldn’t quit, and it made him nauseous and excited at the same time. When he wandered into his bedroom and saw his small, sleeping figure, so many thoughts rushed to him all at once. He was weak. Letting his guard down when he knew such a dangerous person was in his home? Pathetic. But that was terrifying - to know that Ethan trusted him enough to become willingly defenseless. That trust was a bad idea, he knew, but he also knew that these recently developed feelings he harbored made him not want to break it. The blanket snuggled around him only allowed for his head to peek out of the top, and that colorful display of hair was quickly becoming one of his favorite things, unfortunately._

_       Without a sound, he snuck over to the bed and sat down on the edge. Staring off into the darkness was all he could get himself to do while he was drowning in his conflict. All the hatred and possession he had bubbling deep in his stomach had undergone a startling change, and the burning red fire had collapsed into something he wasn’t used to feeling at all. It must have been something akin to tenderness. _

_       He shifted to lay himself down on the bed, blinking at the ceiling. In the background, a clock slowly ticked, which acted as his only tether to sanity for now. At the time, it had been a virtually empty offer, but as he contemplated it more, the thought of running with Ethan at his side didn’t seem too bad after all. They really could be gods. They could do whatever they wanted, however they wanted, and no one would tie them down. No limitations, no alter egos, no lies. Ethan would be his, and he would be Ethan’s. The idea of giving himself to someone else was so foreign that it nearly made him instinctively gag, but whatever sliver of his personality that was moral was telling him that it was okay not to abuse the power he possessed.  _

_       No. No, no, this was wrong. He should be in control. Ethan should tremble under him, do his bidding, make him a king. There was no time for being soft - after all, the only way to truly get him to stay is to make him. He would never be lonely again. Lies and more lies to feed - _

_       Stop. He cared for him. It was disgusting, but true, and no matter how many times the voice invaded his brain and tried to snatch back the aggression, he kept coming back to the same thing. It was nearly impossible to envision betraying him, which made it that much more infuriating; however, he was beginning to think that this fury he felt was not actually fury at all. Rather, another emotion that could burn its way through him like acid. Love. _

_       He had watched it take Mark several times in his life. It lured him in with such sweet words, dripping with sugary promises and kisses. But in the end, it would latch it’s claws deep into his chest and pry his ribcage open wide, taking that precious bleeding heart and beating it senseless. But, therein lied the difference between he and Mark. _

_       He had no heart to destroy. His hollow bones could be filled to the brim with those same candy-coated feelings, and in the end, he would be left neither hurt nor broken. Only empty once more. _

_       His eyes regained focus in the pitch blackness, and he simply observed Ethan’s figure, breathing slow and gentle. He reached up, running his fingers along the outside of the blanket in a manner that he would never show him when he was awake. It was a soft and caring caress, a curiously roaming hand that explored the top of his shoulder and down his side. The slope down to the stomach, the dip of the hip, the straight line of the thigh. He found it fascinating. As he traced his shape, he noticed that his arm would fit perfectly around the smaller man’s waist, so he took a risk and placed it down like a puzzle piece. It required shifting closer, where his body was nearly pressed against his own, and it felt different than every other time they had been close. Then, it was so heart-thumping and risky. But now, it felt… good. Right. And as he fell more and more tired, there was a warmth that radiated between them. An equal exchange to keep him himself and to keep Ethan peaceful. This, too, felt different. And good. So good, in fact, that he smiled to himself ever so slightly as he drifted off to sleep. _

 

_       “Hush. Just enjoy the moment.” _

  
_       Deep inside his self-proclaimed emptiness, he could’ve sworn he felt a pulse. A pulse all his own. _


	9. Carnation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Are you ready to truly be yourself?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ( :^) by the way, i've made a playlist for this fic if anyone is interested:  
> https://8tracks.com/despairsalad/gemini )

      When I thought I woke up to an empty bed the next morning, I couldn’t say I was too surprised. I felt groggier than ever, which made me physically repulsed at the idea of going anywhere besides these four walls. A big yawn and a half-hearted stretch was about all I could muster, so when I glanced at the early time on my bedside clock, I decided that a couple extra hours of sleep wouldn’t do any harm. But when I propped myself up to roll over, a shape at the foot of my bed caught my attention. It was Dark, that much I could explain - but why on earth was he still here? That meant he spent the entire night, which meant that Mark was missing for an entire night too. I shifted the blankets off of myself and scooted to the end to sit next to him, but apparently he was somehow startled by that. Immediately I knew something was off just by that alone. When he turned his head to look at me, his face was in a strange contortion I had never seen before. I could visibly see the inner struggle happening right in front of me, and static began to crackle in the air around us. Alarm bells were going off in my subconscious like storm sirens.

      “Hey, hey, are you okay?” I said panicked, putting my hand on his arm. A slightly powerful shock tingled my fingers on contact, and it stung so much that I nearly pulled away. However, I stayed, knowing that I wasn’t truly hurt.

      “Eth… an…” His voice was garbled, like five different tones layered one on top of the other, and it seemed like a horror movie effect. As I watched him, his cheeks began to color themselves a little more, and the dark eyes that stared at me in fear were now shifting to a warm honey brown. “Ethan... what’s happening? Why am I… where am I?”

      He was changing back. His grip was slipping his entire cover was threatened to be blown. There was only one thing I could do in this situation, and I was surprised to think so quickly on my feet. I gripped his other arm and shifted him to face me completely, and the sheer confusion and panic that I was greeted with was extremely worrisome. Nevertheless, I leaned forward and pressed my forehead against his, talking so low that I could barely hear myself.

      “Take more. It’s okay. You’re falling apart, you need it.” 

      The firmness of my tone reached something deep inside of him, thankfully, and the static around us began to energize again. I fell woozy, as I had anticipated, but not as much as I would have felt comfortable with given my past experiences. I knew he was holding himself back quite a bit, but now was not the time to be generous. I squeezed his shoulders a little more as another wave hit me, and by now I had learned that closing my eyes helped a great deal. i just prayed that he would be back when I opened them.

      Sure enough, he was, and I had never been so relieved to see those dark circles. But as much as I was glad to see him again, the concern that shrouded his face was unwelcome. He pulled away from me and stood up, running his fingers slowly through his messy hair, and I swore I heard his breath shake. It was odd to see him without his signature brand of confidence at least somewhat coming through, which was how I knew this was serious. For a moment I wondered if Mark would remember any of that, and something told me he would. This was not good.

      “That shouldn't have happened. I was doing just fine. I was careful.” His subtle anger was increasingly apparent as he kept going, and he was beginning to pace in front of me while his digital esque colors began to appear. 

      “Hey, it's fine, maybe you just didn't take enough.” I attempted to talk him down and stood up myself, placing my body in his path so he would stand still and calm down. When he whipped around and saw me, I saw only distress. He clutched his chest and pulled at the fabric of his shirt as if he were in pain.

      “I'm getting weak!” He practically snarled, verbally lashing out like a wounded animal. “It's your fault, you're making me like this. It's like I'm-”

      “Turning human?”

      My words made him freeze. All that I could hear in the room was the sound of his breathing, nearly a pant as he gripped his shirt tighter. Maybe this is what we had been trying to achieve this entire time, and stumbled upon the solution accidentally. Or maybe, this was something else entirely. Either way, he began to approach me, and with how sinister his expression was, it was easy to imagine he was coming straight to murder me. I started to back away, but in an instant he was on me, pushing me against the window glass. He had the strength to push hard enough to break it and send me tumbling down to the street below, but I knew he wouldn't. Instead he leaned in close and began to whisper.

      “I hate this. I hate that I feel so weak and starving.” 

      Through sheer curiosity, I reached up between us and slid my hand underneath his own. It was a slow move to be sure I didn't startle him, but even so he flinched and began breathing heavier. He removed his hand so I could place my palm down fully, and I was astonished to feel not just one heartbeat, but two. One was quiet, normal, and steady - the other was pounding, so loud and so close to the surface that it nearly felt like it would burst out. 

      I looked up at him wordlessly, because there was nothing I could say. I couldn't decide whether to feel happy or terrified, and I knew that Dark was the latter. 

      “I hate it… I hate this.” He repeated with less anger. I could tell he didn't even truly mean it. Aggression was his defense mechanism that was quickly crumbling, and he knew that as well as I did. Our grand scheme was likely working, and even though he was the one who suggested it from the very start, he couldn't have anticipated the method by which it would happen. Two people can't occupy one body, so in order to split them forever, he had to become real. At least, somewhat real. 

      “Are you ready to truly be yourself?” I smiled in an attempt to bring his attention around to the important matters. “That heartbeat is all your own, buddy. It’s beautiful.”

      For the first time, he was truly hesitant. When he became so close that I could feel his breath, I could sense the tension and uncertainty all around him. His lips barely kissed me, lingering just barely out of touch and sending a shiver down my spine. It was gentle and kind, a kind of purity that I was unaware he was capable of, and I definitely enjoyed it. I lifted my hands up and cupped his face, feeling the rough stubble on his jaw tickle my palms, and he finally dove in for something more than caution. I loved the way it felt, so raw and incredible, like he decided to bare his true feelings for me for a rare occasion. It wasn’t manipulative or simply an experiment, but perhaps a glimpse into something that could be. It really was beautiful, no matter how fleeting, for the man that I had met in the beginning was not the same man who was holding me gently against the windowpane and kissing me so earnestly. 

      I don’t know how long we were together like that, because my mind was blurring together each tick of the clock with the sound of our breath and the feeling of his skin. My temperature was rising along with my pulse, and when he broke away to kiss my throat I knew that he could feel it. He was taking his time, and it was heavenly. When I heard a low hum similar to that of a purr, it nearly made my breath hitch, and when he spoke it was right against my neck. 

      “We could cause a lot of trouble, you and I.” He said, lacing his fingers through mine and pressing the back of my hand up against the window. “I can take you anywhere you please.”

      “We could see anything, do anything.” I replied, allowing myself to fantasize. The way he spoke so smoothly was driving me wild. 

      “Make other people envy us.” He began to pull me away with him, backing up to the edge of the bed.

      “Walk the streets like we own the world.” I boldly pushed him backward, sending him falling onto the mattress.

      “Maybe steal a car or two.” He quickly pulled me down on top of him.

      “That’s slightly illegal.” 

      “That just makes it more fun.” 

      “Shush.” 

      “With pleasure.” 

      When he sat up and pushed me up with him, I realized I was kneeling above his lap. I put my hands up in his hair and tilted his head back, and he gazed at me with a smirk as he shrugged the flannel he had never taken off. I could see his muscles underneath his t-shirt and it was more than a little attractive, plus that devilish face he was giving was not helping. I silently cursed him for being so damn handsome and such a pain in the ass at the same time, and I gave his hand a playful tug to let him know how frustrated I was. When his reaction was a literal growl, it only made things so much worse. I had to kiss him - needed to - and when I decided to do so, he put his hands on my hips and nearly drove me insane. The electricity was back again, shocking me as he slipped under the edge of my shirt on my bare waist. Nothing but lightning was shooting through my veins.

      When he started to wander and travelled upward, he seemed to take careful note of every curve. 

      “Not so thin and weak after all, huh…” He mumbled in reference to my athletic figure. His tone was offensively amused, so I gave his ear a pinch and watched him pretend to wince. 

      Just as I was about to say something clever, there was a very loud banging on the front door. It startled me so badly that I jumped, and Dark had to tighten his grip on me. Both of our heads whipped up to stare in the door's direction, but neither of us moved at first. It was only when I heard more pounding and Tyler's voice did I bolt up to my feet.

      “Ethan, open up!” 

      I whirled around, eyes wide, and signaled to Dark that he needed to make himself scarce with a little shooing motion. I brushed my tossed hair back and jogged out of the bedroom and through the living room, and as soon as I took a deep breath and opened the door I was bombarded. Tyler nudged himself in and began looking around before turning back to me. Coming in behind him was Amy, who looked about as panicked as I felt but not nearly as confused.

      “Where did he go?” Tyler asked. “Is he still back in your bedroom or something?”

      “W-what are you talking about?” I stuttered, my mind reeling. 

      Amy stepped up. “Tyler, please -” She began, but he cut her off.

      “We came over here together because we hadn't seen Mark come home last night. You weren't picking up your phone, but we figured it wouldn't hurt to check with you to see if you knew. Considering what we just saw through the window, I think you definitely know.”

      Oh god, the window… had we really been so obvious? I should had drawn the curtains, or moved away sooner, but I was so wrapped up in the moment that I didn’t even think. Amy looked at me helplessly, silently letting me know that coming up here wasn't her idea at all, so at least she tried to stop him. Unfortunately, he was too good of a person and too worried about his friends, so once he saw us it was all over. Tyler was the only one who didn't know about Dark’s existence between the three of us, so it must have looked scandalous to see someone who looked exactly like Mark with me. I was incredibly embarrassed to know that our little… whatever was visible to the street below if you were looking for it, but I was a little more concerned about how I would get myself out of this mess.

      “It's not what you think.” I said, a poor and overused cliche. He walked over and peered through the bedroom doorway, and I became increasingly panicked when he stepped inside. If he was still there, it would DEFINITELY be game over.

      “It's not?” He asked, stepping out and clutching a red flannel shirt in his hand. Shit. I cursed myself for not throwing that somewhere else. “Then explain this, Ethan.”

      Amy was silent and so was I, not knowing what to say at all. The look Tyler was giving me was one of sheer disbelief, and it made me feel terrible for a whole other set of reasons than he was giving it to me for. I felt a bead of cold sweat roll down my forehead, and my knees began to wobble. After a minute, obviously expecting a response but receiving none, he tossed the shirt to the side.

      “Man, come on. You know that Mark and Amy are together. Why would you… Amy, why are you not more angry? You're weirdly calm about seeing your best friend making out with your boyfriend.”

      Again, it was silence. What could we even say? There was no other path that I could see besides giving up and telling him everything, but there was no guarantee he would believe a word of it. I was so nervous that I could barely stand, my head was pounding, and my mouth felt dry - everything that could go wrong was happening. I thought I was going to throw up amidst my spiraling anxiety, like there was just a lump in my throat that wouldn’t budge and a hurricane inside my stomach. 

      She was always a genius, Amy. A good person to rely on in troubled times, and a surprisingly smart liar. Not always the best actor, but her excuses were sound, and she was a true hero who could save a bad situation. When she stepped forward, I wasn’t expecting it, but I listened intently.

      “We share him.” She blurted, standing next to me. Okay, I didn't expect that either. Share him? That was one way to explain it, I guess. But she could have worded that better. Tyler blinked at us in confusion like a computer trying to process information. 

      “Y-yeah, we uh… We decided to try something a little less monogamous.” I added, continuing the lie. To sell it, I wrapped my shaking hand around Amy’s shoulders, and she followed along by putting her own around my waist. I was still trembling with nerves, but holding on to her seemed to help, anyway. 

      “That’s why I, uh, didn’t want to come up here.” She gestured around. “Because we’re trying to… keep it on the downlow for now. It’s an experiment. Ethan, Mark, and I are all trying a three-way relationship.” For good measure, she turned and kissed my cheek.

      At least he wasn’t angry or accusatory anymore, and the look on his face was priceless. He seemed embarrassed now, like he was intruding on our “relationship”, and I felt a little bad for lying to him like this. Right now though, that was our only favorable option, so I had to suck it up.

“Why didn’t Mark tell me about this?” He asked, rubbing the back of his neck.

      “Well, like I said, we’re keeping it very much on the downlow… in fact, I think he would be pretty embarrassed if you mentioned it at all.” Amy frowned. “Just pretend we never told you, okay?”

      Tyler looked at her quizzically but nodded in agreement. “Alright, I’m, uh… I’m sorry I just kind of barged in like that. Where did he go, though? Is he still in here?”

      “He’s, um… he’s hiding in the bathroom and can’t hear us. Yeah, he’s kind of embarrassed, so I would just give him a little bit and wait until he wants to talk about it.” I patted Tyler’s arm and smiled at him, but when he looked back at me I could tell he was slightly hurt. I knew he was interested in me after all, but if he was thinking about how he felt than he decided to not say anything. It must also have been a little stab that he had to hear about his best friend’s “experiment” from someone else, but I’m sure he understood.

      “We’ll just be on our way then, now.” Amy briefly hugged me and then walked towards the door, prompting Tyler to follow her. 

      “Sorry for the intrusion, Ethan.” He apologized, smiling awkwardly before taking his leave. When the door clicked shut I sighed in relief, amazed that the story flew. It would be Amy’s job to answer any questions if he asked about it more, so I would have to conspire with her later and make sure our stories were straight. I also hoped that she would drive home the idea that Mark didn’t know he knew and didn’t want to talk about it yet.

      When I turned around, I saw Dark standing in the bedroom doorway and wasn’t even surprised. He clutched the shirt that had been tossed aside, and he was looking at me amusedly. 

      “You both are such good liars. I almost wanted some popcorn for the show.” He mocked, and I felt the urge to pop him in his pretty nose.

      “You have a responsibility too now, you know.” I walked over to him, putting my hands on my hips. “If Tyler ever tries to ask Mark about it, you have to be ready to force your way out as discretely as possible to answer and make sure Mark never finds out.”

      He rudely made a fart noise with his mouth, but I took that as a reluctant agreement. I lightly punched him in the tummy, feeling my state of being a nervous wreck now melting away a little easier. We survived our first accidental encounter, and something told me that if we didn’t fully succeed in our plan extremely soon, it wouldn’t be the last. Secrets can’t be kept forever, especially ones like these.

      Before I even knew what was happening, I felt Dark’s arms lunge to grab me. His strong muscles wrapped around my waist and yanked me upward with ease, and I instinctively shrieked in panic. He tossed me over his shoulder like I was a ragdoll and began chuckling villainously while I yelled in protest, and I suddenly felt very helpless. I wiggled my legs around like a child trying to escape his grip to no avail, and my head briefly began to spin as he charged quickly into the bedroom. He moved so fast that wind whistled in my ears, and I gasped loudly whenever he spun around and threw me down on the pile of blankets below. I hit so hard on the mattress that I bounced, and Dark came tumbled down after me, catching himself on his arms so he wouldn’t straight up crush me. His knees straddled me like I had done to him before, and seeing him hover over me with such a sharp-toothed smile made my cheeks flush bright pink. 

      “Now, where were we?” He said lowly, dropped down to kiss my collar. His hair tickled my neck and I couldn’t stop myself from giggling, which was the last straw to set me off. I started to laugh genuinely, combing through those dark locks as I did so. He peppered me with kisses all over and I continued to quake with giggles at the hilarity of the whole thing. Jesus, what were we even doing? We were reckless enough to make out in front of the window, miraculously got caught by the best friend, somehow successfully lied our way out of trouble, and now we were back at it again even more feverishly? I felt like a rebellious high schooler, doing things I shouldn’t and covering my ass when things went sideways, but never did I stop. It was just simply too much fun, and I think I liked the thrill of it all. I was innocent, he was dangerous, but we clicked in a way that I didn’t quite fully understand. Whatever made the irritating chemistry ignite was probably some stupid psychology like the fact that I’m a repressed nerd and he’s my outlet… or something like that. But I didn’t care about that. All I cared about was how terrified, excited, overwhelmed, and free I felt in that very moment, as I felt his lips trace over my skin. Whatever tomorrow would bring didn’t matter, not now. All that mattered was me, him, and the space between us.


	10. Rose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Then all hell broke loose.

_       This was wrong. _

  
  
  
      When we both came to an agreement that he had been out far too long, I watched him climb out my window, even though he was perfectly capable of just using the front door. He tried to be stupidly cool and mysterious about it, but at this point it was impossible for me get to take him seriously. Something about him seemed slightly off, but I just  brushed it off as some kind of strange side effect. He seemed a little more possessive, as very thoroughly indicated by the hickeys he had given me that I had to worry about covering up. As I sat there alone, I wished he could stay so much longer, and the lingering feeling of him against my collar only made me crave his presence against even more so. We had just existed together, two people with problems and no quick fixes, and it was nice to lay there. Sadly, the crazy amount of time he spent with me meant that Mark was going to have a very big chunk missing from his memory. In a way, it was kind of funny to think that it would seem like he just slept for a long ass time - on the other hand, I felt bad for stealing away his life like that. With each passing day I was getting more and more anxious to finally separate them for good, so no one had to suffer anymore.

      I didn’t realize he had forgotten his shirt until after he had already disappeared. But then again, I didn’t see Dark as the type to forget anything, so he must’ve left it on purpose. I rolled my eyes and leaned over to grab the troublesome garment, smiling at how worn and soft it was. A brief hesitation crossed my mind on what to do with it, but the answer became fairly obvious to me. Over my t-shirt I slipped it on, feeling the warm cotton wrap around me like a blanket, and in the most non-creepy way I could muster I gave it a sniff. It smelled like Mark, a wide open field on a sunny day, but I could also sense an undertone that made my lips curl into a smile. Midnight, like city streets and expensive cologne, and shady alleys where the rain is still fresh and slightly metallic with coppery dares. I inhaled even more deeply, burying my face childishly in the fabric but loving it nonetheless. It was a little too big for me, so the shoulders sagged and the sleeves nearly covered my fingers, but when I stood it was surprisingly the right length. Even though he wore it with the sleeves rolled up usually, I decided to leave them down, because there was something cozy about the over-sized feeling. 

      My kitchen was quiet and peaceful when I got there, and I appreciated how the sun had decided to come out from behind the clouds. If it had been warmer, I would have opened the windows wide up and let the fresh air seep in. Unfortunately, I could already assume it was still cold, so I made do with just staring out through them instead. I poured myself a glass of water and shuffled over to them, smiling to myself. Living on the corner of the building had its definite advantages, so I appreciated the view from both the living room and the bedroom heavily. 

      With all that had been going on recently, I found myself unable to get any good pictures in. I decided to go back and pull out my trusty camera, and like any other lazy afternoon, began to fiddle with it. I took pictures of the sunlight pouring in, the reflections on the ceiling, the texture of the floor, anything I saw. Click, click, click, one right after another, lined up to be deleted at some other point when I felt like it. I gazed into the mirror on the wall that made me come face-to-face with myself, and held the camera over my eye as I took a self portrait of sorts. It was funny to see my unfamiliar shirt paired with my messy bedhead, and made me giddy in a weird way. Was it possible that something good was happening to me after all?

      I leaned back into the couch with my camera resting on my chest, and allowed myself to think for a bit. My life thus far had been, quite frankly, a little bit of a drag. Always the odd one out and rarely ever forging a relationship I could keep, I always had to rely on others to make me feel as though I was important. One thing that attracted me so much to Dark, I guess, was the fact that he made me feel that way. When we were together, I mattered. For whatever reason, I didn’t care - I just liked knowing that he didn’t look right through me. Amy had always seen me for me, which was why we became such close friends in the first place. But he gave me something that she couldn’t: a drive to find meaning in myself. He could show me so many things, including who I truly am. The idea of making people part like the sea when I walked down the sidewalk, in some sort of twisted power fantasy, actually excited me. Was it some kind of darker part of me that was being slowly built by his greedy hands, or had it really been inside me all along? I couldn’t lie and say that the thought of being on top of the world had never occurred to me, but that’s normal for anyone. But this desire that I felt, and this opportunity I was being given was the opposite of normal. Instead of a fantasy, it could become reality. No more lonely mornings, no more tedious work, no more fear; just power and freedom. We could go any direction we pleased, no doubt. A power couple, envy of the general populace and loaded to the brim with fancy clothes and social connections. A modern day Bonnie and Clyde, hitting every bank we could and simply revelling in the rush of being chased. Or even just two people on a private island, isolated, rich, and happy that way. How naive I was.

      I was getting carried away and I knew it, but it was alright to indulge myself a little. This thing that we had between us - that had no label except for perhaps obsession - was getting in my head, but god, maybe I liked it that way. Every day, there was always this aching sadness that crept into me, seeping into my pores like a toxin. Nothing I did ever helped, and even on good days filled with laughter, it always came back to visit me when I was all alone. It wasn't anyone's fault, really. It was just the way my brain worked. But maybe, this time, I had found a solution. To think that everything started with one bad night and one flower shop encounter. 

      I was completely oblivious to the fact that everything would soon be thoroughly changing.  
  


 

  
_       Weak. _

 

  
  
      My day went by like any other day - go to work, clock in, take orders, rollerblade around the parking lot like a total roller derby disco queen, clock out. I was of course distracted through the whole shift, but I was thankful for something to do at least. When everything was said and done, I waved sayonara to my coworkers and decided to treat myself to a soda from the gas station across the street, and admired how peaceful the weather was despite the chill. Bottle in one hand and keys in the other, I jogged back across to my awaiting car where I could rest my tired feet and sip my carbonated sugar in peace. When I set it down in the cupholder, I reached over to the passenger seat and briefly paused. I had planned on going to the store, so I brought a normal shirt to change into (because who wants to wear their work polo to buy groceries?), but the sight of Mark’s flannel laying underneath it made me worry. How was he doing? What was he thinking happened to lose such a huge chunk of time like that? I felt so guilty in that moment that it nearly crushed me, just wondering if he thought he was insane. After I allowed my thoughts to linger, I went ahead to change and slid the soft fabric over my exposed arms once again. So homey. But so ridden with doubt.

      It took me a few minutes to jar myself back from space. The cold air invading my skin had been there the whole day, but it seemed so much colder when I was alone. I was so focused on the numbness in my fingertips and the stinging of my ears that I hadn’t noticed my phone starting to buzz uncontrollably, shattering the silence I surrounded myself with. The caller ID read Amy’s name, which would normally be a welcome thing, had it not followed the events of this morning.

      “Hello?” I answered, turning the keys in the ignition and cranking the heater a little. 

      “You need to get over to Mark’s shop. Right now.”

      Her tone was so urgent that it made my heart skip a beat. “Oh god, what happened?”

      “Just get over here - quick.”

      I hung up and vowed to drive as fast as I could, all while suddenly swimming in my own panic. Shit, shit, shit. What was happening, who did it involve, how could I help? A tight lump was forming in my throat as I exited the parking lot in a non-conspicuous manner, somehow, and performed the most subtle edging of the speed limit as I possibly could. Luckily, the shop wasn’t too far away, but any minutes I spent in travel limbo were minutes that anything that went wrong could go even more wrong. My mind was racing with possibilities; it had to be either big or personal, or both, or else Amy wouldn’t have called. I desperately wanted to call her back and make her tell me what was going on, but it was better to just get my ass over there ASAP and find out for myself.

      Due to my panicked driving and extremely luck, I pulled up to the curb in under five minutes. The first odd thing I noticed was the fact that large blinds were drawn behind all of the windows, shutting off any view of the inside from the outside. The blinds were even on the door, which was adorned by a hanging sign that said “CLOSED” in big, bold letters. The whole thing looked abandoned - no cars around the corner except for mine, no activity, no lights - it gave me the chills. When I went to push open the door, I found it was locked, so I gave the glass a few rapid knocks in hopes of a quick response. After a clicking sound, I saw Amy’s face pop out from behind the door, looking obviously frazzled. 

      “Thank god, get in here. It’s Mark.”

      She pulled me in and latched the door again, but I barely noticed with the scene in front of me. Mark was sitting in the middle of the floor, in a space where shelves used to be. Said rows were pushed aside hazardously, almost like they had been blasted backward by an unknown force. Plants were toppled and soil was scattered across the tile, the aftermath of a theoretical hurricane that left flowers smashed among baskets and ribbons. Mark was breathing heavily and I could see the sweat on his face, and his hair was all tangled up like he stuck his head out of a plane window. When he looked up at me, he looked so frightened and helpless that my mouth dropped open. 

      “I-I told Amy… not to call you…” He panted, and his voice quivered. “It’s too dangerous, I… There’s something inside me.”

      I crept closer to him and knelt down, like I was approaching a feral animal or a scared little kid. I stretched my hand out slowly, but I could see him visibly flinch when I moved. “Hey, hey, take a second to calm down.” Had he done this? 

      He put his face in his hands. “No, no no no, there’s something WRONG. You need to leave before it happens again.”

      “Mark, please don’t push us away. We want to help.” Amy said desperately, crouching down beside me. Her eyes were stinging red as they began to well up, and I wondered what all had happened in my absence. Judging from the tiny, thin cut on her cheek, she got hurt somehow. 

      “I’m going to hurt you, no, please…” He choked, and the floor beneath us began to rumble. The more upset he got, the more the air filled with static electricity, and I knew that this all had to be his final breaking point. The whole shop sounded like a dull white noise now, and the shape of Mark began to flicker from color to black and white, and back again. 

      “You know it’s not your fault, you can’t control this.” She tried reassuring him but the words just seemed to dissipate. 

      “I don’t even know what’s going on!” When he cried out, he tossed his hands in the air, which caused the last remaining flowers on the tops of the crooked shelves to come crashing down. He jumped at his own power and stared at Amy, as if he were pleading with her to do anything to make it stop. He had no idea what to do or who to turn to, and I couldn’t help but think that this was my fault. Things would have come to a head inevitably, sure, but would they have been so violent had I not sped along the process? As his eyes flickered over to me, it was startling to find that they were Dark’s eyes. Everything about him - his movements, his panic, his face - were all still Mark, but that piercing gaze couldn’t be anyone else but Dark. And then, in a garbled voice like two layers over one another, he spoke.

      “Ethan…”

      All the time we had spent together flashed before my eyes. The uncertain fate of those chance encounters, the warmth of his breath, the feeling of his skin… I was so afraid of losing those feelings that I had forgotten to pace myself at all. 

      Then all hell broke loose. The shutters rattled and the floor shook, like an earthquake just beneath the surface, and the lights above began to flicker on and off. Hanging plants were swinging and spilling, and from every corner there was an encroaching darkness that stuck to everything it touched. Tendrils of shadows crept along the walls and slithered to the ground, and my vision began to blur at random. All the hairs on the back of my neck stood when electricity sparked through the air, sending chills down my spine and sending me into a dizzy spiral. Wind was blowing through the entire shop, banging the blinds and smacking shelves together, when suddenly Mark screamed. The glass of the fridges along the wall shattered and glass sprayed everywhere as he cried, and the howling breeze whipped the broken doors open and shut in a frenzy. It was a massive psychic tantrum, otherworldly and demonic, and through the fingers shielding my eyes I could see his form struggling. 

      Blue, red, green, yellow, black. His aura buzzed and flickered faster than it ever had before, and flashes of different parts of him horrifically mutated like a digital overlay. Amy and I cowered when he threw his head backwards, the veins in his neck straining as he yelled once more, but the sound was muffled by the static noise and violent wind. The same blackness that has been seeping into the room was now emanating from him, rising from his chest like a giant inky cloud that I somehow felt familiar to.

      Everything happened so quickly. In one swoop, it detached itself and flew right towards us, going for me first. When it hit me, all the breath was knocked straight out of my lungs, and for a moment I even went blind. All I could feel was a powerful punch to my organs and a force trying to pull part of me with it, before it flew straight through my ribcage and set its sights for Amy. Through blurry eyes and untrustworthy vision I saw her stumble backward just like I had, opening her mouth in a horrible gasp and clutching her chest painfully. When it exited her and flew back around the room, I had to run to catch her as she nearly fell. Her body was weak but she was still trying to be engaged, her eyelids fluttering as she fought to stay conscious. I could feel the threat of passing out looming over me as well, but my heart was beating so fast that it hammered me awake with every pulse.

     The perpetrator itself was in chaos, bouncing off of lights and scattered pots, jittery and terrified and all alone. It was simply radiating this panic and desperation that I felt to my core, quite literally, and it was only getting worse. It quickened it's pace and ricocheted off the wall before flying back at Mark like a giant speeding bullet. Mark, who had been slumped over from exhaustion, was blasted in the chest and knocked backwards flat onto the floor, and began wreathing in some sort of horror movie seizure. His body convulsed and he arched his back as far as he could, curling his fingers and yelling once more. It was god awful to watch, like a full blown exorcism, and we were helpless to whatever may come afterward. The saddest part of it all was his pitiful attempt at the word “Amy”.

      As he seized, a low growl came from his throat. It was low and guttural, animalistic and cruel, like a rumbling tiger stalking you in the night. Amy covered her mouth with her hand and we both backed away as far as we could go, broken glass crunching beneath our shoes. It was terrifying beyond my wildest dreams, to witness a nightmare in the flesh. Two hands, ghostly and strange, began to tear at his chest and claw their way outward, their long pitch black fingers struggling to grip on anything. Arms followed as the hands smacked down on the tile, soft black smoke curling off their surface, and a head began to rise. The strangest part of it was the fact that it was not physically tearing its way out - rather, it was spiritual, like separating an astral form from his skin. But it was strange and violent, and seeing the dark creature struggle was absolutely alien. After a minute or so of yanking and pulling, it made it's final exiting step and crawled its way over Mark's now still body and panted. The smoke and shadow around the room was sliding around and gathering back up to him, blending seamlessly with his form and solidifying his outline clearly. Slowly, surely, the inky skin starting at the fingers began to fold in on itself and turn to flesh and clothing. It was the same as what Mark was wearing, but the skin tone was slightly off in a way I couldn't explain. That jet black hair, when it finally appeared, was a curtain as he still stared at the ground, and there was silence. No more darkness, no more hurricane winds or eerie sounds - just Dark's heavy breath.  
  


 

  
_       But finally, something was right. _

 

  
  
       My first reaction was to go to him. In such a fragile state, it was probably stupid, but I needed to be next to him. However, my feet just wouldn't move. I was absolutely frozen in place. Amy was apparently just as worried as I was, so she flew towards Mark while I stood there like an idiot.

      "Mark? Mark, wake up, it's me." She said gently, cupping his face. He didn't look up or open his eyes right away, which panicked me a little. What if something had gone totally wrong? It seemed successful, at least in a way… but what if it wasn't supposed to happen this way at all?

      When he finally opened his eyes, I breathed a sigh of relief. He looked completely shocked but alright, and confusedly returned the hug that Amy gave him. Next to them, Dark slowly stood up, which also relieved me. He locked gazes with me from across the destroyed shop, and it was like time stopped for a moment. There was something on his face that I had only seen before in my dream - a genuine, beautiful smile. Wide and toothy, filled with joy and love and everything in between. I wanted to capture that, so save it forever and never let go. But maybe, just maybe… there was something else lurking beneath it.

      "You." I heard Mark breathe, and I turned to see that he was looking straight at his doppelganger. "I saw you in the mirror, I thought I was fucking crazy… What did you do to me? What did you do to the shop?" He whispered in confused anger, one hand in his hair and the other gesturing around. "What even are you? Who are you?!"

      As he and Amy stood up together, her steadying him on her arm, the amount of stress he radiated I couldn't judge him for.

      "Hi. I'm the demon that's been living inside your body, invited by your own ego." Dark dropped the smile he previously had and returned back to his regular sneer. Them talking to each other was surreal, to say the least. Their voices were not identical, actually, which didn't surprise me. Dark's tone was richer, like it carried its own echo. As they existed in the same room, it was obvious more than ever how completely different they were in every other aspect as well. The darker hair, the greyer skin, those tired circles and the sophisticated posture. He stood like he owned the entire world yet was forced to slink in the shadows for so long, and now his shoulders were rolled back with the pride of being finally free.

      "You've been tormenting me this entire time! You've been stealing my life away!" Mark was starting to get really angry now, a side of him I had never seen before. "It's because of you that I lost so much time, isn't it?"

      "I love the fact that you don't even fire back about the whole demon thing. You're not even surprised." The eviler twin folded his arms. 

      I could see Mark spiraling. There was too much happening all at once and he was breaking down. "I'm dreaming. This is some kind of messed up nightmare, like a goddamn video game. You're not even real."

      We all stood in uncomfortable silence. His disbelief was pitiful in a way, like a sad attempt to cling to the normalcy we all knew had left a long time ago. It made my heart ache. 

      Dark looked down at his own hands, shifting his tone. “I don’t know. I feel pretty real.” And he looked up to me with that beautiful face, not having to say another word to let me know that he was grateful. I had seen behind his selfishness, and his egotistical habits - I had faith that there was good in him, and I knew that he could be his own wonderful person. He raised one of his hands up out in front of him, and his eyes flickered for a brief moment.

      Around all of us, items in the store began to float up of the ground. Flowers returned to soil, soil returned to pots, and I had to shift out of the way to allow broken glass to reform right before our eyes. Tiles that had cracked under the rumbling pressure were sealing themselves together again, and busted lights were returning and relighting as if nothing had ever happened. I gazed in awe as the shelves righted themselves, and when the very last clump of dirt floated to its original spot and neatly rested among leaves, the entire place looked brand new. It was like the past hour hadn’t even happened, and even the dirtiness of our clothes disappeared. The very last thing was a small gasp from Amy, and when I turned to look at her, the cut on her cheek had vanished without a trace.

      He then lowered his arm, obviously pleased with himself in the most smug way possible. Mark was dumbfounded, and honestly looked like he was about to pass out. I, myself, was pretty shocked too. I had no idea he could do that.

      “Now that I’m free, the possibilities are endless.” 

      He looked terrifying. And I had no idea what he was thinking.   



	11. Gladiolus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was one of the things I loved about him.

      I offered for him to stay at my place after the dust settled, and he accepted without hesitation. His eagerness was unexpected, but I took it as a good sign. Amy said that she would stay behind with Mark to make sure he made it through this alright, but something told me he wouldn’t ever be quite the same. The guilt of my decisions weighed on me like the entire planet, crushing me so much I felt like I might suffocate. I didn’t even know what I would have done in his situation, but I guessed that there would be a lot more screaming. To have another person living inside you the entire time… it was an idea one could never get used to, never mind watching it crawl from your own chest like an alien.

      On the drive home, Dark rolled down the window and the wind touch his skin. When he closed his eyes and breathed deeply, his fingers flexed slowly, and I could tell how much this meant. I could barely fathom what he must be feeling - to be reborn, and have your own body for the first time. I stole a long glance at him as we rolled up to a stoplight, and I felt myself smile.

      “Before, everything felt muffled.” He mumbled, like he had been reading my thoughts. The light turned green, but it was hard to break my stare. He was so soft. So different. “It was like I was observing through a pair of goggles, touching through a screen… but now, these feelings are mine. All mine. Everything.”

      It didn’t take long for us to reach my apartment building, but on the way I began to see tiny sprinkles dot my window shield. By the time we were stopped, it was a good solid shower, but the sun was struggling to peak through the clouds even so. When we stepped out of the car, Dark blinked up at the sky, and gasped at the feeling of the raindrops on his face. He stood on the sidewalk, and I walked towards him, reaching with courage to take his hand in mine. When he looked straight at me, there were drops running down the smooth contours of his cheeks, dripping off his nose and the tips of his hair. He had me without a word.

      I cupped his stupid face and brought him to my lips, tasting the water that slipped into my mouth, from whose face I couldn’t tell. He responded by taking me by my waist, clutching me over that oversized flannel I still wore, and it felt like a cinematic masterpiece. His posture was so confident and his grip was so strong, and the rain that poured over us was like little shocks of coolness against our warm skin. 

_       He just wanted to use you. _

      I broke away, confused by my intrusive thought. No, Ethan. He’s so genuine, he couldn’t be lying to you. It just made no sense, plain and simple.

_       He wants you to trust him. _

      The crippling doubt began to follow me as I made my way up to my apartment, just as he followed close behind. They were the same thoughts that I experienced around when I first met him, but I realized that they didn’t matter anymore. I did exactly what I set out to do, which was take away the danger that threatened Mark’s sanity and everyone else’s life. But the real question was now lingering, and that was what the hell was going to happen next. Would he really keep me in his life? As he demonstrated in the shop, he was so powerful now that it blew my mind. What possible use could he have for me anymore?  
  


 

  
      _His breathing was ragged. Everything was in high definition. Every smell was overpowering, every sensation was earth shattering. He wanted so much more, and when he listened to the pulse of the boy walking up the stairs in front of him, he realized that very pulse was under his control. It was his weakness too, and weaknesses were the most dangerous thing he could possibly fathom. His head was filling up with ideas, so many outcomes that he just wanted to scream with victory. The sheer power that was flowing through his veins was orgasmic, and he heard the new heart he possessed pounding in his ears. He thought that being released would make him more stable, but it was exactly the contrary - he was hungrier. The entire world was his playground, and he wanted to start with his beautiful little toy._ _  
_

 

  
  
      The first thing that happened when I closed my apartment door behind us was his body on mine. He pinned me against the door with all his strength, and nearly knocked the wind out of my lungs. His hands began clawing at my clothes, tugging at my shirt so powerfully that I felt my pulse immediately skyrocket. The confidence he had always possessed had amplified exponentially, as I could tell just from how dominantly and greedily he tried to undress me. He was moving so quickly that I just had to break away, and his chest was heaving when I put my hands on it to hold him back. I leaned my head back against the door to try and catch my breath, and I felt his body pressing against me in every manner he could. When I opened my lids and looked at him, his face was as serious as I had ever seen him, but he was looking more pale than natural. The dark circles were deeper, and he felt so incredibly hot that it was like being held against a furnace. As he his heavy breath made the hair hanging over his face flutter, I began to feel increasingly uncomfortable with how relentless and strange he was acting. My mind was blaring a red alert as soon as I heard him growl, a low sound that resonated through my chest and made my skin prickle in fear. He was different, and I unfortunately had no idea what to do. This was it, wasn’t it? Everything had all been a lie.

      “D-Dark…” I stuttered, giving him a nudge. Despite his complete ability to overwhelm me in an instant, my tiny shove pushed him back enough for me to slip out from his trap, which I actually took as a good thing. But when he turned to face me again after I put distance between us, it was starting to become more apparent that this was not his usual self, and I wondered if what I was seeing was actually the real him.

      When he responded, his voice was a garbled rumble. “What’s wrong, Ethan?” The way he cocked his head so slowly gave me another round of shivers. He started to approach me, his shoulders back in a way that suggested pridefulness. How he could achieve such impeccable posture while stalking towards me oh so slowly was terrifyingly submissing. He was the master of the show.

      I backed up far enough to feel the kitchen counter bump me, but I realized that I had unwittingly backed myself into a corner. All I could do was stare helplessly as that familiar flicker began to consume his body, bathing him in dissociative reality and lining his silhouette with hypnotic buzzing. I briefly considered reaching for a knife in the drawer behind me, but watching his shadows slither and glitch made me realize that it would do no good. I didn’t even want to hurt him because I knew how beautiful he could truly be, but something was turning foul with no solution in sight. 

      “I thought you wanted me.” He continued to inch closer, and my knees started to wobble uncertainly. “Don’t you WANT me?”

      The emphasis he put on the word “want” caused his voice to echo across the room, the vibrations ringing against my ears. Of course I did, I always had, but not now. I was scared and alone, and I felt something very terrible on the horizon if nothing was done.

      “You’re not yourself.” I said, wishing that I had any hope of disappearing. He had gotten within a couple of feet of me now, and was closing the gap quickly.

      “I am more myself than I have EVER been. All thanks to you.” His voice dropped and he reached for my neck, wrapping his fingers around my throat and squeezing. I tried to cry out but only managed a pathetic strangled noise. “I have more power than I’ve ever felt before. I could snap your neck with a flick of my wrist if I wanted to.”

      “You don’t… want to…” I choked, and his grip tightened.

      “I don’t love you.” 

  
  


_       Lies. _

  
  


      “I don’t. Love you.” His words faltered.

  
  


_       LIES. _

  
  


      “I never have.”

      Tears were welling up in my eyes. I didn’t know whether he meant it or not, but it stung like hell. He shouldn’t love me, it was still too soon, but even so I had hoped that maybe I meant more than just a tool to him. When he said he hated me, I hadn’t believed him for one moment - but what if it came from a place of truth after all? His nails digging into my skin was the final sensation to push my tears over the edge, spilling down my cheeks as I continued to choke. I could feel my blood begin to bead up at his fingertips and all I could do was sob. I wept for the dreams that he was shattering and the future he was snuffing out, and I wept for everyone in my life. My whole mind was screaming at me, telling me that I was going to die, and I just pictured Amy’s face. The friend I took for granted, who had been by my side for so long that we were practically spiritually connected. I just imagined her at her happiest, a Saturday evening with just the two of us and a silly album playing in the background. We were dancing, two dorks sailing into the night, and I craved that absolutely unfaltering security I felt when I was with her. God, she was my best friend. And it was always so fun whenever we could rope Kathryn into our shenanigans, just cool kids having a good time. My vision was beginning to fade as the pitiful sobs wracked my weak body, and all I wanted was one more night like that.

      “You c-can’t… lie to me…” My speech was garbled, but at least vaguely understandable. It was a last ditch effort to reach any part of him that may have been honest, but my hope was dwindling. The hands I had grabbed his arm with threatened to fall limp, and at this point I just felt inclined to let them. I couldn’t fight him, and I wouldn’t. No matter how much of an asshole he had been, or how much of a pain he proved to be, I had felt something so real somewhere inside my heart. Perhaps I had just put a little too much faith in it. My arms gave out and slowly dropped to my sides, and I breathed what I thought was my very last breath before my world would soon go black.

  
  


_       This was a nightmare. Stupid, foolish, idiotic. All these newfound sensations and wonders were seeping into his brain, making him forget all that he had learned. What of that future? What of that pulse? Could he truly make that mean something? For once in his miserable existence, he had found something to hold onto and treasure. A boy that never left his thoughts, whose laugh could make his rotten heart sing, whom he owes everything to. He hated the concept of oweing people, but with Ethan, an exception could be made. All the power he felt was just a misconnection, it seemed, for what he really felt deep down inside his newly born soul was pure terror. Frightened of what may come, and what this meant for him. _

_       He had always been a good liar, but when he saw those awful tears and heard the painful muffled cries, he felt himself breaking. This was not what he wanted. He didn’t want submission anymore, and it was hard to understand. He wanted love. _

  
  


      At the very last second, he released me. My sight came flooding back and I sputtered incoherently, gasping for the precious oxygen I desperately needed. My throat ached inside and out, and I could still feel the ghost of where his hand had been. I collapsed to the floor, spent of every last bit of energy I had, and my chest heaved with every greedy breath. In front of me, I saw Dark slowly lower down on his knees, and when I looked to his face, I saw he was crying. It was more jarring than anything else had been up until this point, and even if I had been able, I would’ve have known what to say. He simply stared at his own hands, a single silent tear rolling down his cheek, which were now returning back to a familiar color. 

      “I’m not scared.” He whispered. And I knew he was.

      I leaned forward, still aware of the shadows surrounding us, and gently took the same hand that had clutched me so threateningly. His expression was quiet bafflement as I guided it towards myself again, and I had to say that I was shaking a little. But I rested it softly against my jaw, a caring caress.

      “Gentle…” I croaked, enclosing my fingers around his hand. “Don’t lash out… be kind… Look at me.”

      He blinked and I thought I would witness another tear fall, but nothing came as he did as I said and looked me straight in the eye. I could see every single bit of pain reflected in those deep brown irises. He gazed at me and I gazed back, getting a real peep at that contradictory soul dwelling within, before I felt an odd sensation at my throat. It was a strong tingle, like a small electrical current coursing through my skin, but in an instant I found it easier to breathe. I gasped and took a deep gulp, giving my poor lungs what they had been trying to get, and when I raised my other hand up to feel the area, the blood I had sensed was now gone.

      “There’s still a mark.” He mumbled, crinkling his eyebrows. He looked ashamed.

      Some things take a little more time to erase. I already knew that he was sorry without him even having to say it, though I couldn’t picture him saying it out loud anyway. That was okay. Baby steps of a newborn god. I thought the phrase “still a mark” was kind of funny in a way, because I still felt a reflection of Mark inside of him. He was still a part of him, whether he realized it or not, and that was the way it was always destined to be. He had gained kindness from him, a type of kindness that he could keep and grow with a little bit of help. It was one of the things I loved about him. His potential to do the impossible and achieve wonderful, beautiful things was my favorite. That, and the depth of his soul.

      I took him and pulled him to my chest, nestling his face against my shirt and holding him close. At first, he was rigid and caught off guard, still in shock from recent events. But as I continued to hold him, snuggling closer and combing his hair, he began to relax into me. I felt his arms wrap around my waist ever so cautiously, and his slow, steady breath. I closed my eyes, focusing only on our two heartbeats on this dark kitchen floor.

      “We’re going to be alright.”

  
  
  
  
  
  


      “Okay, I still find it really weird that you had a twin brother and I never knew about it.” 

      The six of us sat around Mark’s living room under the light of the Christmas tree, sipping hot cocoa while a classic played on the TV in the background. It was the holiday season before we even knew it, and on this peaceful Christmas Eve the snow fell fell with gusto outside. 

      Everyone had eventually learned of Dark’s existence, so we had to create a fake identity for him - the only reasonable explanation? A fantastical long lost twin brother, separated at birth and miraculously found again. What were the odds? It was as good of a bullshit excuse as any, and surprisingly, people were actually inclined to believe it. Mark was still uncomfortable with him, but that was expected, and at least he could tolerate being in the same room as him now. Tyler was absolutely fascinated and asked Dark a multitude of questions, leaving the poor man to try and fabricate an entire fake life right on the spot. Of course, he took that opportunity to make himself sound as dramatic and woeful as possible, lamenting about his tragic life as an orphan. Amy and I couldn’t help but steal glances at each other and try not to giggle every time.

 

_       “Okay, we can’t just keep calling him ‘Dark’, that sounds stupid.” I sighed, reclining back on the couch. “What’s something that sounds similar?” _

_       “Hm…. Dark… Dar… Darcy?” _

_       “Too Pride and Prejudice.” _

_       “Daryl? No...Darren.” _

_       “Perfect. Just douchey enough.” _

_       “I hate you both.” _

 

      Thus “Darren ‘The Douchebag’ Fischbach” was born, much to his protest, and now he was assimilated into our little family so much that he sat next to me at our Christmas party. Still brooding as ever, he was the only person in the room wearing all black, but the way he sipped his hot chocolate and actually laughed at jokes made my heart warm. He was truly a new person after so long, and I knew I was right to keep my faith in him. I even managed to convince him to not use his powers in public, which was a definite struggle at first.

 

_       “No one will notice if I just float that down off this tall-ass shelf.”  _

_       “No! Just let me get a sales associate, like a NORMAL person.” _

 

      It was still an old habit of mine to call him Dark though, so in my mind it stuck. Ever since the day he was freed, and the incident in the kitchen, he had never once treated me as anything less than pure gold. An annoyance sometimes, sure, but that was just my personality. I had to reel him back when it came to other people a lot, and his tongue was a bit too sharp sometimes, but it could be entertaining when the person attacked really deserved it. 

      “Don’t worry, it’s still weird to me too.” Mark commented, looking over to his new brother. Out of all of us, Mark had definitely taken the whole situation the hardest, and it wasn’t hard to understand why. It seemed sometimes that they even hated each other - just two personalities that could never mix, ironically.

 

      By the time the party was all said and done, and many Christmas carols had been very badly sung, I found myself standing outside on the sidewalk, waiting for Dark to follow. Everyone else had already gone, and from the outside I saw Mark turning off the lights in his windows one by one. The snow was piling up on the street and painting the whole world white, a stark contrast against the midnight sky. In the soft golden light of a single street lamp I stood, my head tilted towards the stars as tiny snowflakes decorated my hair and graced my cheeks. Everything was silent and beautiful, something that you could write poetry about, really. 

      From behind me I heard crunching footsteps, so I turned around to smile at him as he approached me. His black hair and clothing was already flecked with spots of whiteness, looking almost like little stars against the void, much like the sky I had just been gazing at. He looked grumpy, as usual, so I couldn’t wait to turn that frown upside down. When he came close enough, I put my arms around his neck and he returned the gesture with a comfortable hug around my waist. 

      “I have a present for you.” He said unexpectedly, and I raised my eyebrows at him. I didn’t take him as the gift-giving type.

      “Oh?”

      I felt him reach down and rummage in his coat pocket, and finally he finished out a folded piece of paper. He unwrapped it, the page looking like it was simply ripped out of a small notebook, and I recognized his careful handwriting as soon as I saw it. Inside was a simple card, and he held it up along with the paper for me to examine.

      “So, I wrote down… a bunch of places that you’ve mentioned before. Just cities that you want to visit, etcetera.” He chewed his lip when he paused. “I, uh, thought it would be a learning experience to visit them with you.”

      I blinked at him, not quite able to process. “What’s with the debit card?”

      “That’s connected to an account with a plentiful supply of money. We can go whenever you want and not have to worry about a thing. We could travel the world, if you said so.”

      The thought was incredible. The two of us on a massive roadtrip, nothing but the thrill of adventure and a backseat full of snacks… But wait, where did he get any money at all? He didn’t have a job.

      “Don’t worry, the money isn’t stolen. It’s just… procured unusually.”

      Ah. So he made it out of thin air. Typical. He did tell me that he could give me anything. I felt myself getting emotional as I thought about all the sights we could see, and the opportunity to just escape from it all for a while and live. I hugged him tight, resting my chin on his shoulder, and murmured in his ear.

      “It’s perfect.”

      Out in the chilly wind, holding Dark close to me, I felt a fire in my heart. A spark of something new, risky, and utterly mischievous. No one could hold us down as long as we were together, and perhaps all my wildest fantasies were actually becoming a reality. It was a wonderful feeling, and I let it envelope me as I stood under the glow of the lamp above us. It was only when I had one specific thought that my eyes snapped open.

      “Wait. If you can just make money, why haven’t you been paying rent, you bastard?”

      And of course, his laugh was all the answer I needed. 

      Sheesh, what an asshole.


End file.
